Let us not forget that while F'n was getting his nails manicured the President was out visiting with the citizens of Floriduh who had been clobbered by multiple hurricaines. While F'n has been spending his time avoiding the duties of a U.S. Senator the Commander in Chief is NEVER off the clock!
SO TRUE! And we love him for it . . . HOWEVER . . . now Twinkie is ready to give him a makeover that will put Pepe Pompadour in the shade . . .
First, the next debates or town meeting . . . he will not be scheduled anything so strenuous that day. This time, HE will have the day at the spa. If he insists, he can still cut his nails with his pocketknife, but nothing else is negotiable . . . there WILL be a massage by a reputable Republican massage therapist . . there WILL be a bit more poufing and shaping his hair . . . (help me here, Laura!) . . then, there's a little whirlpool bath and an afternoon nap . . of course, the Crest Whitestrips will have been experimented with cautiously so as not to look like Pepe's Chiclet teeth . . .
Then, he, too, will be wearing the Good Feet Store's custom made arch supports which, as a bonus, add an inch to the height without using elevator shoes; thicker soles on the shoes gladly given by some Republican shoe magnate . . . of course, NO MAN TAN, just a little bit of real sun for a real man . . . but carefully, we don't want to sunburn . . .
. . Never fear, HE gets to choose the suit and tie! . . and, oh yeah, STAND UP STRAIGHT (Barbara help me here!) . . then he can just stand there and blubber, but he will look so good no one will care!!