"Man I love photo-ops that make me look commanding."
Posted on 11/07/2004 1:27:49 AM PST by ninonitti
And now they belong to the ages, another unforgettable comic duo in the finest tradition of American slapstick - Abbott and Costello, Laurel and Hardy, Lewis and Martin.
Dukakis and Kerry. The tag team from Taxachusetts, the can't-miss candidates who did.
They said Republicans couldn't get more than 50 percent of the vote anymore. But they didn't figure on that laugh-riot team of Dukakis and Kerry.
When the stock market crashed in 1987, they said no Democrat could lose in 1988. They didn't know Mike Dukakis very well, did they?
When Iraq blew up this year, they said there was no way President Bush [related, bio] could be re-elected. Come on down, Liveshot Kerry!
Kerry even resurrected Dukakis' aging crew of local losers. John Sasso, a front-runner's front-runner. Michael ``the Genius'' Whouley. Fawning, bowtied bumkissers from Morrissey Boulevard. All of them were older but, luckily for America, no wiser.
Dukakis and Kerry are the matching bookends of the Bush era. Electorally, the Bush years begin and end with the savage stomping of a hopelessly out-of-touch arrogant left-wing elitist from the trust-fund precincts of the People's Republic of Massachusetts.
A couple of weeks ago, Saturday Night Live re-ran some of its best political bits. One was from 1988, a parody of the Bush I-Dukakis debates, with Dana Carvey as Bush 41 and Jon Lovitz as the Duke.
``Let me just sum up,'' Carvey/Bush says. ``On track. Stay the course. A thousand points of light. Stay the course.''
Then Lovitz/Dukakis turns to the camera: ``I can't believe I'm losing to this guy.''
Now, 16 years later, in the election issue of Newsweek, we read that last April, Kerry sighed to an aide as he read how Bush 43's poll numbers kept rising.
``I can't believe I'm losing to this idiot,'' Kerry said.
There you have it, life imitating art. They say history repeats itself, first as tragedy, then as farce. In the case of Dukakis and Kerry, it was farce from the start.
When you get right down to it, they ran pretty much the same campaign on their way to political Palookaville. Dukakis in the tank in Michigan, Kerry in the Woody Allen sperm suit in Florida. Kerry takes a break and goes windsurfing.
Dukakis and Kerry both tried to run away from their own records. The Duke said the issue was competence, as opposed to runaway taxes, runaway weekend-furlough murderers and welfare for illegal aliens. Kerry said he was an altar boy, as opposed to a rabid defender of partial-birth abortion.
Garrison Keillor is still in shock, ditto E.J. Dionne, Paul Krugman and Joan Baez. As another losing Democrat once put it, the people have spoken, damn them.
Dukakis and Kerry. We shall not see their like again. Knock on wood.
Hey! It is funny!
I love this!
That description of Kerry is priceless!
Howie has been following Kerry's career for twenty years or more. Since the election, callers into his show invariably say "You sound like you're still enjoying this," and Howie has admitted seeing Kerry defeated is one of the happiest events in his life. He's even more entertaining than Boston's Jay Severin, who was gloomy about Bush's chances but who's been laughing and shouting "LOSERS!" every day since Tuesday.
Howie is great! On his show the other day, on reports that NPR had a call-in grief counselor for distraught Kerry supporters suffering from PESS (Yes! Really!), or Post-Election Stress Syndrome, Howie noted that he had another problem: spasms of Post-Election Giggle Syndrome!
I remember that well. It was late October of 1987 and the local press opined that the only way George H.W. Bush could win would be if the Democrats ran a complete jackass against him.
And *poof*...there was Dukakis, made to order. LOL!
How cool would it be to find out that they had a club, where they actually met and had drinks, hashed things out, sort of a high-level loser support group/social club? McGovern, Carter, Mondale, Dukakis, Gore, and Kerry...throw in their running mates to make it even more fun. Would that be a sad gathering, or what? Wouldn't you love to go to a meeting just for the comedy potential?
BTW. . .NOT that I care. . .but I am always curious. . .has ANYone seen or heard of a Kerry sighting or Teresa? Seems like more than the usual 'pull/push' off the stage here. . .
. . .and I am wondering 'which' home they decided to recover in; or if this Kerry 'love-match' are even in the same location.
She twisted her ankle on Wednesday. So they say.
I never tire of seeing that idiot lose races...IN NEW YORK CITY, NO LESS!
It's one of the small pleasures I take in life.
Mark Green is sick-ken-ing.
I enjoy the defeats of all democrats.
This time, Dashole's was especially joyful.
Two Massachusetts liberals in 12 years is enough. How many MA liberals ran against the Bushes? Answer: 2.
Admitted? Howie said he hasn't enjoyed himself so much since Monicagate broke -- at which time he said he was "lappin' it up with a spoon!"
Daschle & McGovern.
Two peas in a pod.
Howie lights up a victory cigar!
"Man I love photo-ops that make me look commanding."
Perhaps there could be some federal action to to designate the state of MA as a national historic loser's site, where people could come and experience all of the out-of-touch elitism, leftism, communism and other "isms" that make the place and its politicians so worthy of lampooning.
Not to mention Maureen Dowd, Imus and a host of others.
They're shocked! SHOCKED! I tell you, that the American people could actually vote the way they did.
Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.