Honest -- it wasn't a zipper

San Francisco Chronicle ^ | 01/17/2002 | Christine Craft

[Pokey78]

"IT'S NOT a zipper!" whimpered the red-faced execs at CNN. "It just sounds like a zipper!"

Caught touting credibility out of one side of their mouths while selling sex out of the other, they're referring to a quickly yanked promotional ad -- complete with zipper sound effect -- describing newly hired morning anchor Paula Zahn as "just a little sexy."

[Oschisms]

"Excuse me while I whip this out..."

[Oldeconomybuyer]

In the audio trade, it's know as the "Clinton sound".

[Pat Bateman]

If it wasn't a zipper, what the hell was it?

Also, 'sex' and 'van Susteren' do NOT belong in the same sentence. I will now punish myself for for using them in the same sentence.

[ShadowAce]

I heard the ad on Rush's show yesterday. To me, it sounded like a needle scratching a LP record, not a zipper.

[Freemyland]

"Will Fox News now try to "sex-up" Van Susteren?"

They'll go broke trying.

[oldvike]

Honestly, the first time I heard the commercial I didn't think it was a zipper sound. I thought it was the sound of a needle being ripped across a record to mean that the last phrase regarding being Paula being a little sexy was unexpected and shocking.

[Jonah Hex]

She has a set of preternaturally prehensile lips that are perhaps "too sexy. "

Prehensile lips?

(pause)

(pause)

(pause)

(pause)

.... um, sorry about that, my mind tripped off line trying to picture that.

[oldvike]

That's what I thought too.

[Happygal]

she reportedly paid $7,000 to highlight her hair

$7,000 for a dye job???????? *spluttering coffee of the computer monitor*

I'm in the wrong job...where can I get a crash crimping course?

[RichInOC]

All the cosmetic surgeons in the world couldn't make Greta van Susteren even minimally attractive.

[billorites]

"Prehensile lips? "

So as to kiss my opposable bum.

[jethropalerobber]

interesting read. i think what the author (along with others) is trying to do in the courts is quite misguided. the discrimination, sadly, originates with the consumers, not the employers. at the same time, the behavior of the networks and their consultants really disgusts me - that's why i get my news from the radio.

[Phantom Lord]

To me, it sounded like a needle scratching a LP record

A what?

[rface]

a leggy, high-maintenance blond bump

[Druidstl]

The sound is not a zipper, it's the sound of a record needle being scratched off the record, as if to signify "stop everything!" (think of the old E.F.Hutton commercials - when E.F.Hutton speaks, everything stops and goes silent.)

[Delbert]

Zahn looks great , especially for her age. But Robin Meade of CNN starts my morning news off right. She is awesome.

[mountaineer]

Aaron Brown, also newly hired at CNN, is Zahn's male counterpart. While he may be a very nice man in person, on the air he has a droning and didactic style coupled with a bad dye and comb- over job.

I was beginning to think I was the only one who had noticed this. The majority of over-45 men on CNN seem to have fallen into a vat of hair dye, and they look ridiculous. Oh yes, and Aaron Brown's monotonous delivery puts one to sleep no matter what his hair looks like.

[NC_Libertarian]

I think that stands for "long playing" record.

[hope]

(she reportedly paid $7,000 to highlight her hair)

No kiddin, LOL! I'd never admit to 7k in highlights that looks no better than an $80 weave.