What's the "best" firearm for a man? There's no one answer to the question. All of us are going to have a personal preference. As long as the gun fits your hand properly, and you practice with it, caliber shouldn't matter.
I'll tell you what really burns my butt, though - titanium pushers. In .22 caliber they're fine, but .357 magnum? Come on! Even big guys have bought these things thinking it's going to be a lot better for carry because it's lighter, but when they actually get a chance to try them for the first time, they're sorry they made the purchase. You don't want your life to depend on a gun that you're going to be afraid of!
I'm not in a carry state, but I've been learning holster draw with a Ruger SP-101 using .38 caliber ammo. I need to slim down the grips a little more and it'll be perfect. I'm starting to look at semi-autos, and there are a few nice .32's that I've seen - not too big or bulky, and the recoil is manageable.
My fellow females - I strongly advise you to try as many calibers and firearm styles as possible. Revolvers are by far the simplest. A small .38 will give you five shots; smaller calibers will allow for more, up to ten for a .22. Reloading takes some practice. Semiautos have greater cartridge capacity, but you need to consider the locations of safeties and magazine releases -are they convenient to reach? Some European models also require you to grab the magazine and strip it out - they don't drop free of the frame when you push the release button. God willing, you won't find yourself in a situation where you'll need to load another magazine and time is of the essence, but it's something to think about.
Above all, ladies, don't get sucked in to the "bigger is better" mentality. Stopping power is being able to hit what you're shooting at.
As a retired serviceman and former deputy sherrif, currently packing via unconstitutional CHL laws ,I know what works and doesn't "for me" .............I'm just asking if a survey has ever been conducted regarding such trends........
My 296 Ti-Lite 44 was indeed a lesson in recoil with corbon loads but was rather a nice "possible" carry package when loaded with 200 grain silvertips which provided the best (for me again) in accuracy , controlable recoil and ease of carry. Do I carry it for CHL duties ? No ! It's a gun safe queen weight per se and see's some range time now and then. My everyday, 24/7 pistola , again for me, is a 1911A1 as that is what I have carried , trained and competed with most of my career and is memory-matic for the expected stress of self defense mode.
Again , I just ask a question....... I expect many answers and just wanted to see if a trend was present. Sorry if I offended with the best for a woman question.......
Stay Safe~