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and what exactly is alien warlord Xenu??

Ah! Xenu! Well thats an interesting question!

The main "shadow belief" of the Mystery Cult of Scientology is that 75 million years ago, there was a galactic confederation of planets. The evil alien overlord Xenu ruled them all with an iron fist. Sensing his rule was about to crumble, he decided to "take care" of the Confederations overpopulation problem (the average on each planet being about 1 trillion people.) So he got together with a bunch of tax collectors and psychologists, forcibly put trilions of people into suspended animation, loaded them up on rocket ships that looked like DC-9's without props (remember, this drek was written during the pulp fiction era.) and flew them all to planet Teegeak. (What the Confederation called Earth.)

He then dumps all the people around volcanos on Earth. Las Palmas and Hawaii are mentioned. (Even though Hawaii didn't exist 75 million years ago?!) Then he dumps a few hydrogen bombs into the volcanos, which causes them to explode, and kills everyone. Zoom, up and away, their alien souls fly off. But Xenu, naturally being evil, doesn't want those souls to reincarnate on any Confederation worlds. So he uses these "electron flypaper" traps to capture the souls, and force them to stay on Earth.

(BTW, this incident is why there is a volcano on the Dianetics book. It's supposed to trigger a racial memory of the event...)

Worse, he puts these "souls" into a kind of "brainwashing movie theather" and puts all sorts of junk that Xenu thought would make the souls weak (Like Christianity...Hubbard did not like those folks too much, apparently...). Long story short, the souls, called thetans, reincarnate into clumps. So when we are born, we have thousands of thousands of these dead alien souls in our body. And they screw us up, and cause all of the evil in the world, and all of our psychological problems.

But good news! By signing up with Scientology and paying hundreds of thousands of dollars for the priveledge of doing things like taking massive doses of vitamin E and sweating in saunas and telling damaging and embarassing personal secrets to Scientology agents while holding "E-Meter" tin cans, the Cult promises to help you strip out those Thetans, so you can become "Clear". As you become closer and closer to clear, your Godlike Potential emerges, giving you teleportation, telekensis, perfect memory, etc etc.

The kicker is this: They don't tell you this shit when you sign up. Not right away. They are VERY secretive about it, and this wasn't even known to the general public until the Fishman Afadavit forced it out into the open, maybe only 10 years ago. You need to spend a lot of money to make it to OT level 3 (Operating Thetan) before they tell you the "Big Secret". According to Scientology, all of you who read my words will now die of pnemonia, because your minds were not "prepared" for this Big Truth.

I am not making ANY of the above up folks, I swear. Scientology is one of the greatest cultural threats of the 20th and 21st Century. The Germans KNOW a cult bent on world domination when they see one. Why do you think they have banned them left and right?

Btw, John Travolta is OT 7. By now, he should have some amazing mental powers. Maybe he could use them to improve his acting..