WIPE OUT GLOBAL WARMING: CROW PROPOSES LIMITS ON TOILET PAPER - It's NOT satire

washingtonpost ^ | 4/23/07 | GeorgiaDawg32

[GeorgiaDawg32]

Crow (4/19, Springfield, Tenn.): I have spent the better part of this tour trying to come up with easy ways for us all to become a part of the solution to global warming. Although my ideas are in the earliest stages of development, they are, in my mind, worth investigating. One of my favorites is in the area of forest conservation which we heavily rely on for oxygen. I propose a limitation be put on how many squares of toilet paper can be used in any one sitting. Now, I don't want to rob any law-abiding American of his or her God-given rights, but I think we are an industrious enough people that we can make it work with only one square per restroom visit, except, of course, on those pesky occasions where 2 to 3 could be required.

[GeorgiaDawg32]

ROFL..the jokes write themselves

[Smokin' Joe]

Boy, they really are desperate to sell newspapers.

[highlander_UW]

When I was a baby I didn’t use toilet paper, just diapers...so that’s my TP offset for current days.

[Lurker]

Boy, they really are desperate to sell newspapers.

I vote we start shipping Crowe our discarded Sears catalogs...

L

[Caipirabob]

Of course, such a dignified lady is worthy of the respect and admiration afforded by polite society.

Uhng...

[Darkwolf377]

Or you could just use the paper inserts from her CDs. If you bothered to buy any.

[GeorgiaDawg32]

this isn’t satire, but it should have been..who would have been able to think something THIS ridiculous up??

[generalhammond]

Why isn’t there any rationality in this looney debate. I thought the more paper and timber we harvest from trees, the more carbon we extract from the air, given that the trees grow back and suck in CO2 as they are designed to do.

[Graybeard58]

I read the whole thing. It’s really hard to believe that this woman is so utterly stupid.

Award a recording contract to whoever lives the “greenest” in a contest. Wipe your mouth on your sleeve instead of using napkins. What a bunch of horse hockey.

[MarkT]

She should get back on her meds.

[Yossarian]

Here it is at original size:

Sheryl Crow: Open for new ways to deal with warming.

[Fresh Wind]

Is she talking about squares of toilet paper, or sheets of the Washinton Compost?

[taildragger]

Go head, Ms Crow be the 1st to participate in this scheme.

Did you see what this fartknocker and Lauren David did to Carl Rove?

[djf]

I think Lance dumped her after she took a dump...

[03A3]

It’s really hard to believe that this woman is so utterly stupid.

Well she did teach in public school prior to becoming a singer.

[WorkerbeeCitizen]

"One of my favorites is in the area of forest conservation which we heavily rely on for oxygen."

A tad uneducated - a product of gonernment education.

[Wonder Warthog]

"I thought the more paper and timber we harvest from trees, the more carbon we extract from the air, given that the trees grow back and suck in CO2 as they are designed to do."

You are correct (and Ms. Crowe is so full of it that she will need lots more than one square). The more paper that ends up in landfills, the more CO2 will be "sequestered" from the air.

Stop recycling paper!!!!!!

[kb2614]

YOU’LL PRY MY TOILET PAPER FROM MY COLD DEAD HANDS!!!! GIVE MY CHARMIN OR GIVE ME DEATH!!!

I am NOT ever shaking hands with Sheril Crow. Yikes!!

[Sapper26]

Why not just mandate the use of the three sea shells.

By the way, my brothers and I developed the ‘dining sleeve’ 40 years ago, as our mother would attest to.

[rod1]

Oh this is the person Crow. From the title and being posted just prior to the posting of the bird flu story, I though this was the bird.

Same brain though so I am only half wrong.