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Asking for advice about depression after losing my job
myself

Posted on 11/02/2012 11:44:36 PM PDT by proud American in Canada

Hi all,

I hesitated for a long time to post this--particularly because our keyboard is so sticky it is difficult to write and post. I was just hoping for some advice. If I posted in the wrong place, I hope the mods will move it.

Julie


TOPICS: Health/Medicine
KEYWORDS: aging; depression; jobloss; sexlife
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To: American Constitutionalist
ohh my... so many typos,, so little time..

Corrections:

The only advise I can give you is that many of us are in the same boat as you are so you are not alone. You did the right thing to share, but a word to the wise ? do not air out all your dirty laundry, only to those whom you trust.
61 posted on 11/03/2012 1:43:02 AM PDT by American Constitutionalist
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To: proud American in Canada

If you haven’t already, go through your budget line by line and get rid of absolutely everything that you don’t NEED. You might be surprised at how much you’re spending on what are really luxuries.

I don’t know what your lifestyle’s been like or what’s viable based on where you live, but some things that come to mind are.... Trash service (haul it yourself), lawn service, various subscriptions, gym/club memberships, cable tv, the kids’ allowances if they’re getting one (sorry guys).... Telephone land line if you’re using cell anyway. Stop eating out.

Take a good, hard look at your house. If it’s become an albatross around your necks, consider selling it and downsizing. You have one child nearly grown. Is a small condo or townhouse an option if you must own?

And don’t worry about getting older. It’s a sign of strength. Nobody lives to be old by being a wimp. =D


62 posted on 11/03/2012 1:44:50 AM PDT by Nickname
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To: proud American in Canada

Have you had your thyroid checked? Low thyroid can exacerbate depression. I could not fight my depression until I got my thyroid levels up. It has made a world of difference.


63 posted on 11/03/2012 1:46:49 AM PDT by mouse_35 (Watergate didn't come with a body count. Impeach Holder now!!!)
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To: American Constitutionalist
Ohh my... sorry about all the typos folks..

Corrections:

You said you have a year of law school at Northwestern, law school that you finished at UC Boulder ?

create your own conservative News Paper or your own Media.

GOD WILLING and hopefully ? next week when we hear the words " PRESIDENT ELECT ROMNEY " many of us will feel a heavy weight lifted off of our shoulders.

My advise to you about your husband ? I know it's difficult, but, please don't take his complaining coldness and grouchiness personally it's a way humans let off stream.
64 posted on 11/03/2012 1:51:55 AM PDT by American Constitutionalist
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To: proud American in Canada

I’m searching for a (better) job now and completely understand. I have found that Joel Osteen on Facebook and Kindle books has pointed me in the right direction — to trust God in HIS timeline. I’m volunteering with organizations, selling items on ebay with good success, doing yardwork and cleaning the house, and of course applying locally and figuring out when and if I should search out of state. It’s scary but nothing God can’t handle!


65 posted on 11/03/2012 1:54:23 AM PDT by Moonmad27 ("I'm not bad, I'm just drawn that way." Jessica Rabbit)
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To: patriot08; RegulatorCountry; Berlin_Freeper; The Wizard; All

Hi, all;

I have already taken out my contacts so I am pretty much blind. Going to bed now, but I wanted to check the thread and thank you all. I really appreciate all of your replies. :)

Have a great weekend—and I will be praying, The Wizard—there is no better answer for life’s troubles. Now I’m thinking of Allison Krauss (sp?) and her band. :) Great songs. :) Take care and good night,

J.


66 posted on 11/03/2012 1:58:20 AM PDT by proud American in Canada
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To: mouse_35

Been there! My thyroid ruined years of my life and so did te doctor I was seeing.. Periods of depression followed by periods of extreme anxiety. Finally went to an endocrinologist, who diagnosed me. The thyroid can reek havoc on metabolism, and unfortunately most doctors don’t get it, they run blood tests that mean nothing. See an endocrinologist first before you accept depression as a way of life. (Vitamin D3 is essential so have that blood test also).


67 posted on 11/03/2012 2:10:36 AM PDT by Toespi
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To: proud American in Canada

Join the Marines. They never leave anybody behind.

If you are too old, join Free Republic. They have the same attitude.


68 posted on 11/03/2012 2:13:00 AM PDT by LurkingSince1943 (Former War Criminal)
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To: Kickass Conservative
" As they say, this too will pass. "

That's good news.. so as long it's not a Kidney stone for me.... yikes ! lol.
69 posted on 11/03/2012 2:21:47 AM PDT by American Constitutionalist
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To: proud American in Canada
[That is good advice—they actually sell sunshine machines at the local drugstore to help with this.]

I would buy one of those lamps. I lived in Northeastern Vermont for two years. People would get depressed and drink a lot over the winter. But about the middle of May they would become joyful and sort of manic. I experienced this myself and later looked into it.

70 posted on 11/03/2012 2:22:13 AM PDT by Brad from Tennessee (A politician can't give you anything he hasn't first stolen from you.)
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To: The Wizard

” Bring your troubles to Him, and leave them with Him and go about your life doing what you can “ and ? enjoy life every days as it comes your way.


71 posted on 11/03/2012 2:32:01 AM PDT by American Constitutionalist
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To: proud American in Canada

Trust me girl, 50 is not old. Best thing to do is to get up early every day and head out the door for a run. Force yourself. It is hard to be depressed when you are running. It frees up your mind to wander without distractions of daily life. Running was always a carefree time for me. After a week or two, you will look forward to it and not have to force yourself. You will feel better about yourself and physically be in better shape. If you don’t like running (its best because it releases endorphins into your blood stream that give you a little “high”) then try any exercise regime. But do it regularly.

I recently had open heart surgery at age 64. I had complications where I “died” for a short while and had to be resuscitated. My doctor told me it was a miracle that I survived the cardiac arrest after surgery. It took months and months to recover, not only from the surgery but the after effects of the “near death” experience. But since then, I feel very blessed to be alive and little things that used to bother me in life, don’t anymore. I am much happier because I could see first hand in real time that I could have died and not come back. I don’t recommend this as a cure for your depression, of course, but feel compelled to relate the story to you to illustrate that things in life can always be worse than what you have now.

Try to count your blessings instead of dwelling on your shortcomings. Life will seem much brighter for you. I hope this advice will help. Good luck and keep your chin up. Things do get better with time.


72 posted on 11/03/2012 2:41:30 AM PDT by HotHunt
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To: proud American in Canada
I am on medication. So that's not the answer.

Maybe you are not on the right meds, because it sure sounds like you have symptoms of clinical depression. Also be aware that some physical conditions (like thyroid, mentioned by others), can have a profound effect on mood and well-being.

Just throwing this out - have you considered something like Lyme disease? It can also show symptoms similar to yours. Don't rule out an undiagnosed physical/medical condition.

When you are up to it, do a little online research on depression medications - some work better than others for certain people. If you haven't already, go to your doctor and get a complete physical with blood work - to rule out any medical conditions.

If your doctor is not on board with aggressively trying to find out what's causing your depression and helping you, then get another doctor.

73 posted on 11/03/2012 2:47:16 AM PDT by floozy22 (The Bro must GO)
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To: proud American in Canada

So, you are now an unemployed print journalist; why does that not surprise me? why does it surprise you? The simple fact that you came here to tell your story should tell you the way print journalism is going, just like the Dodo bird it will be extinct in a few years.
That does not mean you should give up your career, it just means you have to change a little.
Your income with your tightwad boss was 450 a week, wow.
Dearheart; YOU CAN DO BETTER THAN THAT! My mother worked as a waitress for over 50 years and for many of those years she supported a family of four just on her wages and tips.
I understand that you want to keep on writing but we do what we have to in order to keep the boat afloat.
Plus the fact you would be amazed at the human stories you will hear at the tables and behind the counter. Write them up and send them in; can’t hurt, and you might be surprised at the reaction you get when some one hears the point of view of the average man and woman on the street.
The sleeping all the time and being tired is a sign of depression; you are only a whole 50 years young and still have at least 30 to 40 productive years in front of you, SO GET OFF YOUR DUFF AND DO SOMETHING. The longer you allow the world to kick you the easier it will get, so don’t allow them to do it at all.
You have a good education, us it for something in a related field, doesn’t have to be writing but I am sure you could work that in some how. What I am trying to tell you is; DAMN CHILD, BE CREATIVE, you already have the tools you need.
Don’t let the rest of the world run your life, because they are not qualified to do so.
Always remember kiddo, “NON ILIGITIMA CABORUNDUM”, (don’t let the bastards wear you down).
Now go out and conquer the world, you know how to do it.


74 posted on 11/03/2012 3:06:01 AM PDT by 5th MEB (Progressives in the open; --- FIRE FOR EFFECT!!)
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To: proud American in Canada

I had clinical depression and no insurance or money for treatment. I could barely make it 10 feet from my bed but forced myself to go to the library to read on the subject. Even though this was 25 years ago, I still remember the four things that all the books had in common which I believe saved my life.

1. Get out of bed.
2. Open the drapes.
3. Go outside and get sunlight on my skin.
4. Force myself to go to public places and interact with people.

It sounds too simple to be effective, but I was broke and couldn’t afford medical care or meds and it worked. I also will point out that most of the authors I read never mentioned the most important facet to healing yourself and that is a deep spiritual relationship with our Lord Jesus Christ.

I pray you are healed and can pass these simple steps on to others.


75 posted on 11/03/2012 3:14:08 AM PDT by DocRock (All they that TAKE the sword shall perish with the sword. Matthew 26:52 Gun grabbers beware.)
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To: proud American in Canada

50 isn’t old. I’m 54 and can do more push ups, pull ups and run further than most 18 year olds. That part is in your head.

I was a radio talk show host until 2003 when I got fired and made a decision to stay in one place (radio talkers mover a lot) so that my daughters could have a stable life. I went into real estate at age 45. Brand new at it. I’ve had some good years and some not so good years. Bottom line is I kept at it, developed relationships and put my life and future in the hands of God. My wife is a stay at home Mom.

BTTT. Enjoy your good health. Quit with the “I’m 50 and old” crap. Go to a gym. Walk. Join a “Jazzersize” class. You’ll feel better, look better and develop confidence.


76 posted on 11/03/2012 3:37:11 AM PDT by albie
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To: American Constitutionalist
If you can keep your sense of humor, you can find things to laugh about, even in the worst of deprivations. Little things start to count--some a lot, things which were either taken for granted or ignored so long as they were a given.

Long ago, I spent a year living without steady work, without central heat (in North Dakota) or running water, living off the 'king's deer', much of which was cooked over an open fire. Yes, funny things happened, there were a lot of laughs, too, and the idea I was not the only one in those straits helped keep me going.

I honed my skills at barter, I found spot work, I found ways to get by, and with time, things got better. I wish I had written about the back side of an oil boom, but doing so as a retrospective would not capture the experience nor have the weight of writing about as it happened. Boom and bust is part of the industry I work in, and only three winters ago I was shoveling snow for Christmas money. This year, I'll make six figures.

The first part of getting out of the post-layoff slump is realizing that your situation is temporary.

The second part is making the moves to pay the bills by taking temp work, spot jobs, even lesser jobs, only Julie can write about it, which ties in with getting back to full time writing.

It's hard to stay in a funk when you are doing what you love, and one of the best ways to get over being bummed about your situation is to be actively doing something about it.

YMMV.

77 posted on 11/03/2012 3:40:46 AM PDT by Smokin' Joe (How often God must weep at humans' folly. Stand fast. God knows what He is doing)
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To: proud American in Canada

Bless you. Lots of good ideas on this thread; especially Post # 3. - When our bodies call for rest, there are just times we have to take a nap (without feeling guilty); it’s surprising how we wake up recharged. - Do one major job a day; it’s also surprising how just that accomplishment adds up to make one feel better about things. - Be thankful for what money IS coming in; and it IS important to give - to others and to the Lord. - So, splash your face, brush your teeth, brush your hair back and take it a day at a time!


78 posted on 11/03/2012 3:51:23 AM PDT by Twinkie (REMEMBER BENGHAZI !!!!)
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To: proud American in Canada
sorry...you can't vote pResident O'Bozo out, that would lighten the load. 8-) *joke*
keep fighting that early stage depression, it can be very hard on you.

79 posted on 11/03/2012 3:51:57 AM PDT by skinkinthegrass (Anger a Conservative by telling a lie; Anger a Liberal by telling the truth. - RWR 8-)
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To: proud American in Canada

I had chronic depression last year. These activities helped:

1. Start your day by making a list of what you want to do that day. Cross things off as you knock each item out. This gives you a sense of accomplishment by the end of the day.

2. Write a list of 50 to 100 things you believe. Whittle that down to your top 15 or 20. Then whittle that down to 5 to 7. Write those down on an index card and laminate it. Carry it with you always. Look at it frequently. That card describes the “ideal you” - so every time you look at your “ideal you” card, ask yourself what the person on that card would do next. Then do that.

3. If you are depressed for too long, your brain can get rewired to the point that it “forgets” how to be happy. Be aware of how your own body is playing a role in keeping the status quo of depression, and force it to get out there and do something active and healthy instead. Even a 20 minute walk can get the good stuff flowing in your blood and brain again. Just keep at it, never give up or give in. Willpower is the key.

4. Volunteer. Food bank volunteering worked for me. Helping hungry people get food puts things in a different perspective - you might lack steady work, but at least you have food, and can help others who don’t even have that much.

5. Stay away from TV for awhile. The media programming these days emphasizes drama drama drama, and your physical system can’t cope right now. The programs are designed to create tension on purpose, and the advertisements to relieve that tension. The whole shibang is an emotional rollercoaster. Get a good book and listen to music you like.


80 posted on 11/03/2012 4:00:44 AM PDT by Mudcat (What would Reagan do?)
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