Using and selling drugs is perfectly conservative. Drugs aren't a sin and are only illegal due to an un-Constitutional overreach by the government. Care to point out a clause in the Constitution to show me otherwise or are you gonna just keep talking out of your ass?
Gay marriage? Not conservative because of the marriage part. Gasys can get together all they want and enter into any legal agreements that and free person can, but it's not marriage.
Abortion? I have the perfectly conservative view that respects a women's right to choose...to not get pregnant. Once she is pregnant then there is a child involved and that child has rights.
Porn? Perfectly conservative that people should be free to make their own choices. You see ,unlike you, I understand that if someone is granted to power to declare porn illegal, they might also use that power to declare other things illegal. Again, consenting adults can do what they want as long as they bear the costs of their decisions themselves.
Homosexuals in the military? - No one has the right to be in the military. I had medical issues that kept me out. Other things can keep other people out. If we were attacked as a country and there was fighting in the streets, I know I wouldn't give one bit of a damn who the person fighting next to me wanted to screw as long as they were fighting for our Constitution.
I think that you are probably a nice person, but apparently just a tad dense. If being a conservative means what you think it means I don't want any part of it. My definition is to follow the Constitution as written. Your definition seems to include shaded of Republicanism and puritanism. no thanks.
Both prohibition and making drugs illegal are laws pushed by “progressives”. They did away with prohibition because it was such an abject failure, but they added the “war on drugs” because it is a clear nanny state plus up in so many ways.
All drugs were legal until the progressives made them illegal in the 1920’s. Yes, we had problems with people becoming addicted to opium. It worked better than the current prohibition by a long shot.