Thank you for interpreting my first hand experience as a cry for sympathy. I know actual experience in these matters is unimportant to bone-headed ideologues like you and it’s very difficult to see plainly when your head is up your ass but by now you must be used to living like that.
There are many things I would love to have that I know will never be mine. Among those things is five minutes with you in person.
I would gladly hold your coat while you tuned this asshat!