I want to comment... but even though it says satire.. I’m not sure it is.
This one reads like reality
The game with John Semmens pieces is to try to figure out which quotes are accurate and which are written by John.
I'm usually pretty good at guessing, but not this time. I thought that John made this up: "I am not convinced from what I know that carrying privately owned weapons would have stopped that individual." In fact, that was an accurate quote. However, John wrote the next sentence, "Clearly, the base's command structure was never seriously threatened." General Mark Milley might agree with that, but he did not say it. Perhaps he just forgot.