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You pay $4K more than who? I presume that you are comparing what your taxes would be if you were married and your spouse had no earnings vs. what you pay now.
If you and your spouse had equal earnings, you would pay the same or more in federal taxes if you were married filing jointly vs. if you were both filing as single. There is still a marriage penalty in the Internal Revenue Code.
The premise of your claim is incorrect.
The marriage penalty was removed with Bush’s initial tax cuts in 2001 and certainly in the 2003 tax cuts. So, I hate to say you’re wrong and I do know what I am talking about. The tax penalty is on single people.
One more reply to you. It’s interesting that you do admit that there is a tax penalty based on married or not. Do you believe that people should be penalized/taxed based on marrriage status?