Thank you for that. In karate and swimming lessons I’m made to feel like the bad parent, the one who does not discipline her child properly. My husband is home for 48 hours at a time so it’s not lack of proper male role model. In fact, my son’s 2-3 hours of bounce house/trike time is while my husband is working out. It’s their time together while our daughter is napping. We just left karate because my son could not focus and stay still. We’ve tried just about every method of discipline: spanking, time outs, taking away special toys, explaining good and bad behavior, etc. His actions continue. Right now he is in the kitchen jumping up and down in a circle while reading a Leap Frog book and sing a Taylor Swift song. He’s been up since 7 am and has had no nap. If I ask him to say a Hail Mary, Our Father, or his four karate statements (positive statements all his teacher’s students must memorize) he can rattle them off perfectly, all while fidgeting excessively and looking everywhere but at me. None of the other four year olds in his class can memorize the first one properly, but they can stay in their spot and mind the instructor. When an instructor works with him one on one, my son gets it instantly. When he’s with the small group he dances in a circle and violates the other students’ personal space. The child is intelligent, but just cannot focus regardless of what I do. At breakfast yesterday morning I actually considered tying him to his chair. I just couldn’t take it anymore.
Whoa!
Did you just say your child is FOUR?? And male?
I thought we were talking about a school-aged kid, one much older than your son.
Having reared three of those critters, I would say that, even with the hyperactivity, he sounds pretty normal.
Not every kid naps. Our three sons had a stay-at-home mom, their diet was healthy, bedtimes appropriate, and still two of the three exhibited strong ADD symptoms.
Please just accept that your preschooler is a handful and enjoy him. Set boundaries, lower the boom when he crosses the line, and learn to laugh.
This sounds just like my son before he went on stimulant medication for medical diagnosis of ADHD and eventually a mood stabilizer for medical diagnosis of bipolar disorder.
He had terrible self esteem from always being disciplined and being avoided by the other children who didn't want to be friends with such a child, not to mention parents making sure that their child avoided playing with my child.
He just earned his BA from SMU where he had been awarded a full scholarship for five semesters of study (worth $100k+) after excelling at Collin County Community College while earning his associates degree. He would have graduated a year earlier if he hadn't decided to go off all of his meds after his freshman year...and run off to Hawaii to pick pineapples...which seemed to be a good idea off of his meds. I don't know why a person would decide in advance not to try stimulants, if there was the possibility that it could change their child's life dramatically for the better, as it did with my son.