Football team names, man…I’m tired of Panthers and Tigers and Wildcats. I would like to root for the Cincinnati Mice, man. “Go, Mice! Let’s win for the pink and white!” Well you’d have a whole rodent division, man. You’d have the Hawaii Hamsters, the Georgia Gerbils. Guys would be All-Rodent. Ya dig it, y’know. The Oakland Raiders, man. What about the victims? The Virginia Victims. I’d like to see any animal that’s alive ought to be eligible to be for a team, man.…The Texas Tumors, man. How about the Kansas City Crabs? “Well, the Crabs were all over the Cowboys today, Bill, uh…yes indeed.”We get to this point yet?
— George Carlin, “For Name’s Sake”