I seldom visit Free Republic anymore but I saw your post and felt that I needed to reply. I am going to tell you something different from the other posters.
My father died 26 years ago. From the time he was diagnosed to the time he died he spent 10 long years slowly and agonizingly suffocating to death. It was a horrible way to die. On the other hand his sister had it much different. From the time she discovered that she had cancer she had one month until she died. She had little pain and passed comfortably. She had a month to tell us all that she loved us and that she was proud of what we had accomplished. She was proud that all of her nieces and nephews were fine upstanding people and that she helped us along the way. She told us how much our love meant to her and asked for forgiveness for anything that she may have done in the past to hurt our feelings.
She had time to tell us about her life and what were the highlights that brought her joy. She also told us a couple of things that she regretted and the lessons that she learned.
My aunt had faith. Her doctor had previously had her addicted to a prescription drug and she fought her way through recovery. One night she tried to make her way from her bed to the kitchen and began to falter along the way. She felt a warm hand take her hand, it gave her strength and guided her the rest of the way on her short journey. She was convinced, beyond any doubt, that it was Jesus that took her hand. She knew that Jesus loved her and was there to help her. She told very few people about this for fear that they would think that she was crazy. But she never wavered in her belief.
She felt that she had completed the tasks that she was sent to earth to accomplish and that Jesus was waiting to help her come home.
At the time I was very sad to lose my aunt and wished that she had lived longer, but the older that I get the more I think that she was truly blessed and I only hope that when my time comes, that I will die like my aunt and not my father.
One point that is very important is that my aunt had unwavering faith while my father was the opposite and had no faith at all. I have often pondered if his slow death was an attempt by the almighty to bring him back to the Lord. Someday, after I pass, I have a lot of questions that I want to ask and that is one of them.
I tell you all this to let you know that you have a great opportunity to be like my aunt and to say all the things that should be said and to apologize for mistakes that all of us have made at some point. You can pass into Jesus’ hands knowing that your work is done and that He is ready to welcome you home for the rewards that await.
I hope that you can beat the cancer and live a long time. But if not, I hope that you use the remaining time wisely and make peace with those around you.
May God Bless and Keep You.
Thank you for the story.
In December, 2009, I was on the side of a mountain (7000 ft) during a blizzard by myself.
As I went to relieve myself, I slipped on ice on a rock and fell 6 whole feet (zipper down).
Onto a sharp rock. I lost my spleen and left kidney that night, and broke a lot of bones. I was by myself, and pretty much bled out internally before they found me, with frostbite and hypothermia.
I had a discussion with God that night. I went through the worst of dying that night. Pain to the point that I passed out (thank you, Jesus! for passing out).
Since that time, I've tried to live as your aunt lived. I haven't always done that, but I've been mindful of it.
All of this is in God's Hands. It's above my pay-grade.
At least, tonight, I know that if the pain gets too bad, I will pass out (thank you, Jesus). I'm warm. I'm not lost on the side of a mountain with a crew searching for me.
I've been through the bad part before. All I have left to do is the final phase, and I intend to put that off for a long time.
/johnny