I’ve always wanted a monkey. My wife says no.
I suppose it depends who who is changing its diapers.
Never went there because of the monkey. These folks had a TV. We would get one a couple years later.
My ex had a wooly monkey. Horrid, wretched, vile creature! Forty years later, just thinking about it makes my flesh crawl.
They bite.
“Trash the Caddy, Clyde”
No, no, no-stick with normal pets-dogs, cats, birds...
When my cub was little, one of her friends had a spider monkey for a pet-the people lived a couple of houses away, and every morning when I passed there on the way to work, the monkey could be seen racing by the clerestory windows on a cornice, throwing something down-it was crap, and it was being thrown at the owner’s two cats, I learned...
The woman also used to dress the thing in a costume every Halloween and have it hand out candy to the neighbor kids. One warm Halloween, I was barefooted when several of us moms took our little ones over there to let them get candy from the monkey. For some reason, the creature took a dislike to my feet, grabbed the left one and bit my big toe really hard, and then proceeded to screech and throw candy at everyone until the woman got hold of it and put it inside. Horrible pet...
“.. my wife said no”.
You obviously married an intelligent woman. :)
If they are all alone and don’t have enough to do, male monkeys will spend most of their time masturbating, while female monkeys will spend their time presenting themselves to you. If they get angry at you, which is often if you keep them locked up, they will fling feces at you or try to urinate on you. Monkeys are happiest in a troop with a lot of social interaction.