[Psalm 73]

Years ago (many, many) I was camping/back-packing in Newfoundland - after a few days thought it would be a good idea to grab my bar of Ivory soap and take a bath in a stream.
I wouldn't exactly call it refreshing. Took my "guy things" several days to return....

[DUMBGRUNT]

grab my bar of Ivory soap and take a bath in a stream.

Ivory soap! Oh my!!!

They probably have your DNA on record, and are still looking for you!

If soap must be used, only Dr. Bronner’s Pure-Castile Bar Soap!

Dr. Bronner’s Pure-Castile Bar Soaps are biodegradable-vegan! Bronner’s Magic Soaps to clean-body-mind-soul-spirit instantly uniting One! All-One!!

Note: You are probably safe, they use the same database for the gun owners; never did work.