Need advice - self defense training for 11-13 year olds

tbw2 | 03/07/2017 | tbw2

[tbw2]

My son needs to learn self defense that is practical against physical assaults and bullying. I do not want recommendations for pretty looking martial arts that are utterly useless when your safety is at stake, and ideally something that can be learned in a few classes for the basics to be practical, not a "spend a year here to learn anything of any value".

[JBW1949]

As Ouderkirk said: Isshin Ryu

it is very learnable for kids...it is 50% hand and 50% foot work..

Krav Maga is extremely brutal, in fact that is the training Navy SEALs receive.

[buffaloguy]

Any move in Judo using your open hand to push back the head is polite sport. In the street fight it is an open hand upper cut to snap his head back and take him off his feet.

Judo is quite lethal if need be.

[Fokker DVII]

Gracie “Bullyproof” is a great program.
It’s the same system taught to the military, without the chokes.

[mumblypeg]

Kudos to you for wanting your kids to learn this skill.
Look for “Dojo”
Most Dojo martial arts schools will offer a basic 6-weeks SELF DEFENSE class which is simpler than the swirly-feet, achtung board breaking stuff.
It’s straight to the point: basic street fighting skills.

There are also lots of youtubes online, for home practice in addition to the classes, but I would not rely on youtubes only. You gotta do it with a real life opponent / teacher in a class. But the youtubes can add useful visual pointers. Again, look for “dojo” and “self defense” in youtube titles.

After learning basic self defense IOW how to fight, then your kids may want to graduate to long-term disciplines like karate, judo, Krav Maga. Those are not only badass fighting skills, but also sport, fitness, tournament-level stuff.
But right now they just want to know how to fight off a bully, right?

Two things to know: 1. forget everything you’ve seen on teevee. If you do that in real life, you’ll just break your own knuckles. The right way to hit an opponent is a lot easier and more efficient than you might think.
2. The opponent’s size doesn’t matter. It’s about center of gravity, points of maximum pain, and counterintuitive moves (unbalancing the opponent, letting him fall.)

Also, a punching bag for your home is worth the investment.
Good luck!

[LouieFisk]

Although you’ve been given various martial arts as well-intentioned replies, it seems that’s not what you’re really looking for at this point; my suggestion would be for him learn to fight dirty - eye gouging, groin kicking and so on. Something that will teach a prospective bully that he’s going to walk away hurtin’ bad if he starts anything.
Along that line, this may be of interest as a starting point:
http://lifehacker.com/5825528/basic-self-defense-moves-anyone-can-do-and-everyone-should-know

I was taught to never start a fight and walk away from one if I could. But if I couldn’t, and found myself in the thick of it, to make sure I came out the “winner”. Anything’s fair in love and war, as the old saying goes.

[JerryBlackwell]

I suggest tae kwon do as the art of choice. There is more to martial arts than fighting; you need to learn the discipline and self control taught in the traditional Asian arts. Anyone can learn to fight but we teach the confidence to stand there and not fight until absolutely necessary. And then fight as the baddest m-fer in the valley. Let me know if you want some info on my dojang.

[IronJack]

ideally something that can be learned in a few classes

Oh, you're looking for Doan Xist, the ancient art where you can learn to cripple Chuck Norris in three easy lessons, and exists only in Ralph Macchio movies.

Get serious.

[IronJack]

A lot of people don’t realize Tai Chi is actually a fighting art. They think it’s just dance moves for old people in a park.

[LaDivaLoca]

Krav Maga! Been training in it for 10 years now. No katas or forms. But pick a good and certified dojo. Does not matter what age you start - it is practical system of self defense. Never thought that a woman my size at 120 lbs and 5’4” can actually throw off a man 2X my size. However, it is a way of life and not for competition. When we spare with protective gear we do hold back so we do not hurt each other too much. We wear our bruises as badges of honor and eventually your body gets used to it.

[joethedrummer]

“Learn to fight dirty”

I agree. He should know that fighting is a last resort, but once it is unavoidable, one MUST think like the Donald - win.

The alternative is to get beat up and most likely repeatedly.

If you are STUCK in a fight to defend yourself, fight dirty. Teach him how vulnerable the gonads are. Those will take the other guy down. Then you need to figure out how to keep him there til he comes to reason.
Make it HARD and quick. That’s the way to win any fight.

Again, it’s a last resort and to be treated like a power tool; you only take it out of the box when needed AND you know how to control it.

[LaDivaLoca]

My instructors here in Phoenix also trained under Darrin levine. Our school hold an annual fund-raising for his late wife, Marni, who died of cancer. Darrin came over a few years ago and held an all-day seminar that I attended.

[philman_36]

Explosive Jeet Kune Do & Krav Maga Training

All have their place and learning/skill level of learning.

Kung Fu for weapons, Aikido for broken bones, ripped muscles and torn ligaments, Judo for countering and throws, Jiu-Jitsu for submissions...

There is something different to learn in all of the arts.

A little of everything and you just have to practice putting it all to use. Mixed martial arts.

[DaxtonBrown]

I did three years of wrestling 7th 8th 9th. One of the best sports out there. For a while I attracted some bullies, they regretted the encounters.

[LaDivaLoca]

Completely agree. I took Taekwondo, Kung Fu and now in Krav Maga. All of my instructors past and present always strongly advised us to run away if able to but only stay and fight if no other choice. Our school holds seminars where we get to train in real life situations that are simulated. Our instructors work with and train members of the Military and LEOs. Seminars apart from the everyday classes are fun and a learning experience. We have Rape Prevention seminars, Weapons seminars, Hostage and airplane seminars, and many more.

[daltec]

I will say that what your kid (and you for that matter) gets out of it will almost entirely depend on the instructor and classmates. Visit several schools; take advantage of any free classes. How long have students been attending? How long has the school been teaching? Etc.

Also, a lot will depend on how fit or active your kid is, or how he/she will react to physical closeness, pain or perceived threat of pain, inflicting pain on others, etc.

That being said, from the little I know of Krav Maga, it is currently popular, lots of schools, and does seem like an effective, straightforward personal defense -- if your kid is pretty fit and is not bothered by the thought of potentially seriously hurting other people. Tang Soo Do is another similar fighting style.

Aikido, mentioned several times, is a good alternative -- it is an excellent demonstration of balance and leverage, and of using an opponent's strength against them. Although it is a little formal and "mannered" for me personally.

My own best personal recommendation would be to check out Hapkido, which I started studying in 2010. Hapkido is closely related to aikido, which both have their roots in aiki jiu jitsu. If your kid might respond better to "win without fighting" than to "kick 'em in the balls" then Hapkido may be of more utility than krav maga or other "hard" martial arts. Although hapkido can be pretty hard too! But it focuses a lot more on non-resistance and allowing your opponent to do their own selves in. While strikes play a role in hapkido, and kicks more so, the main focus at least on my school is in a very wide range of "compliance" techniques, joint locks and holds, throws, pins, as well as escaping from the same. Blocks, evasions, disarming techniques, pressure points, and also situational awareness, how not to "look like a victim" and what to do if the bad guy gets the drop on you. My class is older and we have a lot of military and law enforcement (and former), so that might skew the instruction, but on the whole you can perhaps see it as a little less potentially violent than krav maga, and a little more practical and immediately useful than aikido.

If your kid enjoys it, though, any martial art will be helpful and valuable. If nothing else, than in terms of fitness and self-confidence. Our class shares space with a tae kwon do class for younger people. TKD sometimes gets a bad rap, but there were some serious students in that class. Including a couple girls, maybe 14-15, 5' max and 90 pounds soaking wet. And any guy who oversteps his bounds with those young ladies would very likely regret it, I can assure you.

Again, I encourage you as the parent to visit the schools, talk to the instructors, get a feel for the instruction, and perhaps even take a class or two yourself to see how it goes.

Good luck!

[Jonty30]

I saw a video of what happens when you speed up Tai Chi and know how to use it in a fight. Surprisingly effective.

[philman_36]

Train the mind to accept the necessary level of violence needed in the situation.
Some people just don't have the inclination to hurt others and it may hurt you.

[buffaloguy]

It is a very effective fighting art, breaking bones and tearing tendons.

The junk you see in the park is almost unecognizable to me as I learnd it to end a fight early.

It is really brutal.

[philman_36]

Always liked the actual sparring in TKD, both full and half speed. Forms for structure and practice and freestyle of the forms in action.
How I looked at it anyway.

[Trod Upon]

Whatever you choose, at that age he really needs to have the judicious use of force and the responsibility that comes with it drilled into him. Teach him early to never use force in service of the ego—only for personal safety and defense of loved ones.