Why was the bridge on the river upset with David Lean? He made the Bridge on the River Kwai.
Then there was the Indian Guru who refused novacaine when he went for a root canal. He preferred to transcend dental medication.
So, if Anderson Cooper decides to go straight and marries a normal woman, and they have a child who turns out to be a midget, would that kid be a, ahem, MINI COOPER?
I always liked “Rudolph the Red knows rain, dear.”
Here’s a hot one for you sodpoodle, Q&A format:
Q: How do you spell the fireproof material, asbestos?
A: Asbestos you can.
Remember those idiot celebs who “threatened” to move to Canada if Trump got elected? Never mind the Great White North. If they’re ever gonna make good on promises they should move to Southern Croatia where they can CRIMEA RIVER.
I would tell my daughter if she ever married a guy named Ford, Dodge, Benz, Ferrari, Bentley, Lincoln or Rolls PLEASE don’t name her daughter Lisa.
Robinson Crusoe was walking along the shore one day when he saw footprints in the sand. With a deep sigh he said,”Thank God it’s Friday.”
My grandfather told me when I was about 11 years old to never marry a man for his money, because once I had spent it, I would be stuck with him.