Won't You BEMy (Work)Friend?Only two in 10 people say they have a best friend at work. But companies, aware of how much culture matters, say trying to foster friendships couldn't be more awkward.

Korn Ferry ^ | April 12, 2024 | Arianne Cohen

[DoodleBob]

According to a Gallup poll, just two in 10 people have a best friend at work. The group that has seen the greatest decline is younger workers: For those age 35 and under, the two-in-10 figure is down from 25 percent in 2019. All of this has gotten some attention since the US Surgeon General’s declaration last year that loneliness can have serious health consequences. “Employees are isolated and lonely,” says Julianne Holt-Lundstad, a professor of psychology and neuroscience at Brigham Young University, who posits that the rate of surviving a job for people who are socially connected is 50 percent higher than for those who aren’t.

What’s missing in particular today, experts say, are “best friends at work,” as opposed to “work best friends.” The former, unlike the latter, go out to dinner or to sporting events on a weekend. Interestingly, experts say younger people are especially hungry for these connections, since they tend to be more open about themselves. “Younger people are much more their whole selves at work,” says Hannah Lomax, a senior workplace consultant at Gallup.

But any corporate leader will tell you that fostering friendships at work ranks among their toughest challenges.

…

In studies, Dunbar has showed that most people have an average of about five loved ones, 15 good friends, and 50 loose friends. Given that most careerists spend the majority of their waking hours in the office, ideally many of those 15 good friends are at work. But what leaders tend to forget is that it takes time to build friendships—around 40 to 60 hours to form a casual friendship, according to a 2019 study out of the University of Kansas, and over 200 hours to form a deeper, more meaningful one.

[BlueLancer]

... it takes time to build friendships—around 40 to 60 hours to form a casual friendship, according to a 2019 study out of the University of Kansas, and over 200 hours to form a deeper, more meaningful one.

Well, that must be why I have no friends: I kept forgetting to punch-in on the time-clock ...

[DoodleBob]

Maybe.

There are many pockets of normal in corporate America. But you have to find them. There are a few women I know who are very much into women’s rights etc…but they confide that they are very aware that women are the biggest backstabbers, and actually point out who are the “mean girls.”

What women at work REALLY dislike - in my experience - is guys hitting on them. It still happens. Personally, I’d be in favor of the women kicking the offender after a warning night in the ruts. Frontier justice.

Your HR partner is your friend, not the enemy. There may be stupid wokey programs, but they have ninja-like skills at untangling big messes. They’re really looking to keep things running smoothly. Never make HR your enemy.

Colleagues at work can be a great source of strength, humor, know-how, and the best ones help create lasting corporate memories. But once you retire or move to another company, you’ll never hear from almost all of them. And that’s the way it SHOULD be.

[7thson]

One of the worst jobs I had was for a government contractor after I retired from the U.S. Navy. I started working for them in January 2001 at 43 years of age. About 99% of my co-workers, boss, and just about everyone else in the company were in their 20’s and early 30’s. My co-workers liked to meet and drink after work about 2-3 times a week. Beomg retired military, I was doing that before most of them were born. One of the worst jobs I ever had.