I hava idea to finda the new Cardinal. Why dontcha holda some sorta contesta. We can call it, how do you say, da "Finda da Pope in da pizza" contesta. Firsta, you hida da Pope inna pizza pie. Den, da firsta contesta dat findsa da pope ina da pizza getsa to be da new cardinal.
Vera sincereamente,
You amico,
Msgr. Guido Sarducci, OD
Hey, Mista Sama..
....you gonna geta youselfa inna biga troubla if you impersonata a mana ofa da clotha.
You say tena Ave Marias and senda me fifty dollahs (USa of A currencio, per favore)and I giva you a plenary indugencia.
A piu tardi,
Msgr. Guido