I just remembered one from the Clinton years: “Government HealthCare; all the efficiency of the Post Office, all the compassion of the IRS.”
My wife mailed a package yesterday. The conversation at the Post Office went something like this:
"Ma'am, does this box contain explosives?"
"No, it's a book."
"Are there flammable chemicals in this box?"
"It's a book."
"Firearms?"
"It's a book."
"Contraband of any kind, such as illegal drugs?"
"It's a book."
"Is this a book, Ma'am?"
"Yes."
"That'll be $7.50."