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Sorry for your loss.

I think it’s important to understand the difference between forgiving and relaxing punishment. They are quite separate. I always forgive my son when he does wrong....he still gets punished though. We may forgive terrorists, but we still prosecute war against the responsible parties as part of the punishment. That’s how I see it anyway.

If you forgive someone something done against you, you take the loss on yourself without recompense from the other party. Like Jesus said, if someone strikes you on one cheek, turn the other one. He didn't say, "Exact retribution, ie, punishment, and then turn the other cheek." See also his parable about the manager who was forgiven his debt. He wasn't "forgiven" but still punished. It was after he wouldn't let other people off for what he himself was let off that the master tracked him down and thoroughly beat the crap out of him. To forgive someone is to completely forgo any kind of punishment of him at all, though Someone Else could take the punishment on himself.

While we may have a moral obligation individually to suffer evil without returning retribution, we don't have that option when others in our care are threatened. We're not obligated to forgive offenses against them on their behalf but obligated to whack the malefactors if we're unable to stop them to begin with.