My marriage lasted 32 years until my better half succumbed to breast cancer. Although I quibble with the word choice “losers,” the observations and philosophy of this article seem spot on.
I prefer 'surrendering to self.' When I manage to do that, all of my relationships, God, wife, children, are much better, and I, as a result, am much happier. That being the case, why is it still so darn hard? I'm sorry for your loss.
10 years next month for us.