If I were speaking for myself, I would say: my problem is that for my entire existence I have been surrounded by sensible, decent, fair-minded, truth-telling people, capable of being reasoned with, starting with my excellent parents.
My problem is that I have always acted on the assumption that MOST people are trying to do the right thing MOST of the time.
My problem is I have never failed to observe that most people have mundane interests that respond to mundane give-and-take: bicyclists are interested in bikes, tires, roads; gardeners are interested in seeds, plants, soil; cooks are interested in recipes, ingredients, pots & pans; and all will relate with intelligence and fairness to those who have similar interests.
No matter what the religion. No matter what the language. No matter what the nationality.
Are there groups for whom this simply does not apply?
I still have hard time taking it in.
In tribal societies (eg. Afghanistan) the occupation of a tribesman is warrior. They care about guns, bombs, and being a warrior worthy of their ancestors. They are only interested in learning and the modern world to the extent that it makes them more effective warriors. Everything else is a distraction or worse, threatens their way of life. Islam codifies tribal mentality and makes it the word of Allah.
Here are some great video clips on the subject by a great author, Stephen Pressfield. Well worth watching, especially Episode 2: “The Citizen Vs. The Tribesman” Pressfield really explains what we are facing better than anyone else I have heard. Too many people, espeically in government simply cannot comprehend what to us is an alien mindset. IMHO Geroge W. Bush’s problem was just that, which got us into the whole nation building fiasco that we can never win.