BREAKING: The Minneapolis Public Schools board has voted unanimously to change the physical location of all of their schools. Classes will be held at the zoo. They also voted unanimously to be renamed the Minneapolis Public Zoo and instead of diplomas to award fruiti-tooti awards to all graduates.
Participation trophies
Minneapolis needs to get serious about racism and move all their schools to Lagos. ;-)
That would have worked just fine, but, there was not enough room to safely house all three sets of animals behind the bars. So the animals had to be let loose, and the far more deadly administrators and students kept in lockdown.