If an adult permitted a child to be raped, and didn’t do anything to stop it, would you revere that person?
I would find that person, who could have stopped the child rape but instead ‘permitted’ the child rape to happen, an evil person.
I would question the morals of anyone that worshipped a person who could stop such evil, but chose instead to watch a child be raped.
God permits evil briefly in order to abolish it permanently. There is no other way to permit the free will you cherish. He gives everyone a free choice. You won't get a better deal.
All the people in hell will still be clinging to their independence and their hatred of God. The gates of hell will be locked from the inside.
But He demonstrated His love for you and me by sending His only Son to pay the penalty for all of our wrong and abusive choices. By rising from the dead, He proved He is who He claimed to be.
You have argued forcefully the foremost argument against Christianity. I used to argue it, too, until God convinced me of His love. You are not yet convinced, but it usually takes six or eight hearings of this good news before we're ready. Today, you heard it again.
I'm praying for you.
Dan