The Guild 4-11-2004 Happy Easter

<"I>I was a better man with you as a woman than I ever was with a woman as a man."--

Say What????

121 posted on 04/14/2004 3:15:03 PM PDT by Iowa Granny (Impersonating June Cleaver since 1967)

From the Dustin Hoffman film, "Tootsie," where he played a man pretending to be a woman.

122 posted on 04/14/2004 3:18:10 PM PDT by mountaineer

thanx. I'm not much of a movie goer, so this went right over my head.

123 posted on 04/14/2004 3:33:36 PM PDT by Iowa Granny (Impersonating June Cleaver since 1967)

Sorry - you had to see this flic - tremendous, btw.

LOL at your response...and if one had not seen the film, totally understandable.

(IG, mountaineer, yall...that WAS a tortuous scene...I'm not sure how they got through it.)

124 posted on 04/14/2004 4:05:46 PM PDT by lodwick (Wake up, America!)

Dustin Hoffman as Michael Dorsey in "Tootsie" to Jessica Lange's character.

125 posted on 04/14/2004 4:09:33 PM PDT by Endeavor (Don't count your Hatch before it chickens)

Oh Jeez, Gran, you have to see "Tootsie" - it's a riot. Seriously, rent it.

126 posted on 04/14/2004 4:12:18 PM PDT by Endeavor (Don't count your Hatch before it chickens)

Victor David Hanson, insightful as always:

George W. Bush...has, in a mere two and a half years, reversed the perilous course of a quarter-century. Since September 11, he has removed the Taliban and Saddam Hussein, begun to challenge the Middle East through support for consensual government, isolated Yasser Arafat, pressured the Europeans on everything from anti-Semitism to their largesse to Hamas, removed American troops from Saudi Arabia, shut down fascistic Islamic "charities," scattered al-Qaida, turned Pakistan from a de facto foe to a scrutinized neutral, rounded up terrorists in the United States, pressured Libya, Iran, and Pakistan to come clean on clandestine nuclear cheating, so far avoided another September 11 — and promises that he is not nearly done yet.

Here's the article.

127 posted on 04/14/2004 4:24:55 PM PDT by Timeout (Down with Donks!)

I will look to see if I can find a place to rent it.

128 posted on 04/14/2004 5:28:10 PM PDT by Iowa Granny (Impersonating June Cleaver since 1967)

Seriously, rent it.

Rent it, buy it, steal it, whatever you have to do - just see it.

It is great viewing.

129 posted on 04/14/2004 5:34:14 PM PDT by lodwick (Wake up, America!)

This afternoon I asked Mr. B why he was going to vote for Kerry (expecting some intellectual issues). Answer: Because he's not Bush.

Aw c'mon, I said, there has to be an actual reason other than he's not Bush. Nope, he says. I can't believe that's your answer, I said thoughtfully.

If you want another answer ask someone else he told me. To which I replied, I have! That's the only answer I can get from every Kerry voter I ask!

130 posted on 04/14/2004 5:45:17 PM PDT by BigWaveBetty

If I go to jail for stealing it,,,,, can I get the Guild to take turns visiting me?

131 posted on 04/14/2004 5:45:57 PM PDT by Iowa Granny (Impersonating June Cleaver since 1967)

While looking for Tootsie, check out that new movie 'The Beast and the Bitch', starring Kerry and Clinton, the story of two government drones, one the beast of Washington the other is just a plain old Teresa's bitch.

132 posted on 04/14/2004 6:04:03 PM PDT by BigWaveBetty

Last year President Bush visited a soldier in Iraq who lost his leg in a landmine accident. He promised the soldier that when he was able to run on his new prosthetic leg that he would run with him.

This is our president keeping his promise today.

133 posted on 04/14/2004 6:13:46 PM PDT by Hillary's Lovely Legs (I am trying to stop an outbreak here and you are driving the monkey to the airport!)

To: lodwick; pubmom; Carolina; All

Why as Adults we shouldn't Mess With a Child's Reasoning:

A little girl was talking to her teacher about whales. The teachersaid it was physically impossible for a whale to swallow a human because even though it was a very large mammal its throat was very small. The little girl stated that Jonah was swallowed by a whale.
Irritated, the teacher reiterated that a whale could not swallow a human; it was physically impossible.
The little girl said, "When I get to heaven I will ask Jonah". The teacher asked, " What if Jonah went to hell?"
The little girl replied, "Then you ask him".

A Kindergarten teacher was observing her classroom of children while they were drawing. She would occasionally walk around to see each child's work. As she got to one little girl who was working diligently, she asked what the drawing was.
The girl replied, "I'm drawing God."
The teacher paused and said, "But no one knows what God looks like."
Without missing a beat, or looking up from her drawing, the girl replied, "They will in a minute."

A Sunday school teacher was discussing the Ten Commandments with her five and six year olds. After explaining the commandment to "honor" thy Father and thy Mother, she asked, "Is there a commandment that teaches us how to treat our brothers and sisters?"
Without missing a beat one little boy (the oldest of a family) answered, "Thou shall not kill..."

One day a little girl was sitting and watching her mother do the dishes at the kitchen sink. She suddenly noticed that her mother had several strands of white hair sticking out in contrast on her brunette head.
She looked at her mother and inquisitively asked, "Why are some of your hairs white, Mom?"
Her mother replied, "Well, every time that you do something wrong and make me cry or unhappy, one of my hairs turns white."
The little girl thought about this revelation for a while and then said, "Momma, how come ALL of grandma's hairs are white?"

The children had all been photographed, and the teacher was trying to persuade them each to buy a copy of the group picture. "Just think how nice it will be to look at it when you are all grown up and say, 'There's Jennifer, she's a lawyer,' or 'That's Michael, He's a doctor.' A small voice at the back of the room rang out, "And there's the
teacher, She's dead. "

A teacher was giving a lesson on the circulation of the blood. Trying to make the matter clearer, she said, "Now, class, if I stood on my head, the blood, as you know, would run into it, and I would turn red in the
face.." "Yes," the class said. "Then why is it that while I am standing upright in the ordinary position the blood doesn't run into my feet?" A little fellow shouted, "Cause your feet ain't empty."

The children were lined up in the cafeteria of a Catholic elementary school for lunch. At the head of the table was a large pile of apples.
The nun made a note, and posted on the apple tray: "Take only ONE. God is watching."
Moving further along the lunch line, at the other end of the table was a large pile of chocolate chip cookies. A child had written a note, "Take all you want. God is watching the apples.

134 posted on 04/14/2004 6:16:51 PM PDT by BigWaveBetty

Seriously, rent it.

Rent it, buy it, steal it, whatever you have to do - just see it.

It is great viewing.

135 posted on 04/14/2004 6:24:29 PM PDT by lodwick (Wake up, America!)

To: BigWaveBetty; Hillary's Lovely Legs; All

Page Six snippets:

IS Bill Clinton using his long-awaited autobiography to help Hillary win the vice presidential spot on Sen. John Kerry's ticket? "If Kerry names her his running mate, the book's release will suddenly be delayed until after the election," said one political expert. Dick Morris - whose own book, "Rewriting History" (a play on Hillary's "Living History"), is due out May 4 - told PAGE SIX: "I think that is very possible. I think that it is also a bit of a threat . . . that if [Kerry] does not choose Hillary, Bill will dominate the environment during the campaign and distract attention from the ticket. If Bill, who has trouble finishing anything and procrastinates constantly, actually finishes the book, there is a reason. Likely she was nagging him to do it so he could raise the pressure for her." ...

SIGHTINGS. . . TERESA Heinz Kerry having a virgin bellini sent up from Nello's as she had her hair done [Who would have suspected she actually had her hair done?] upstairs at the AKS Salon and a half-dozen Secret Service agents and their three vehicles were parked on Madison Avenue .... MONICA Lewinsky and Adam ("Average Joe") Mesh bowling next to each other at Bowlmor Lanes

________________

There has to be a joke about Monica and a bowling ball, but I don't know what it might be.

136 posted on 04/15/2004 4:07:12 AM PDT by mountaineer

Putting up a new thread... I'll post your last post to the new one.

137 posted on 04/15/2004 4:34:26 AM PDT by BigWaveBetty

138 posted on 04/15/2004 4:49:10 AM PDT by BigWaveBetty

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