Posted on 10/04/2004 2:24:41 PM PDT by WarIsHellAintItYall
60 Minutes news special. Transcript of upcoming program.
Dan Rather interviews Mr. Lincoln.........
Rather: Good evening and courage. We are in the White House this evening with our President during a trying time. It seems as if during the past few days, three more states have joined the Confederacy and intend to consolidate as separate states. And now, a question for the President.
President Lincoln, it is said in the New York newspapers that Virginia, North Carolina, and Tennessee have left the Union due to the fact that you sent Federal ships and troops to Charleston last month. Could you enlighten us on this matter?
President Lincoln: I would be more than happy to, Sir. You see, Federal troops have been in Charleston for years. They were occupying and protecting the harbor from inside their forts. Our forts. Due to the natives being restless there, our troops moved to a larger fort in the middle of the harbor. But, alas, their food supply was cut.
So, I loaded foodstuffs, you know, rice, sugar, coffee, pork and care packages from loved ones, and sent them on Federal ships to feed the troops. So, Dan, I did not start any war.
Rather: Yes, Mr. President. Just last week, your counterpart in the South, Mr. Jefferson Davis, said that there would be no war unless it is brought to the South. So, therefore you are not planning to send any troops over there, are you?
President Lincoln: Maybe I am, maybe I am not.
Rather: Good answer Sir, thank you. I believe that you essentially said the same thing in your Inauguration Speech.
I understand that you do not believe that Mr. Davis is a valid candidate for President of the Confederacy. Could you explain that.
President Lincoln: Yes, Dan. My people have done a search of the records at West Point, and have concluded that Mr. Davis received special treatment when he was appointed to the war college. Also, he was absent from several classes and did not take a final physical before graduation.
Rather: Hmm. Yes, I will put some of our people on this and see if there is any truth to the matter.
President Lincoln: Dan, I have some memos here that may help.
Rather: What is the origin of these, Sir.
President Lincoln: Well, let's just say that I know the secretary at the Point, and she said that they are accurate. She knows what goes on over there.
Rather: Well, that is good enough for me. It will save time and money. We will go with it.
President Lincoln: Dan, one final thing. As a leading journalist, what do you think is more accurate....the facts or your opinion?
Rather: Mr. President, my opinion is based on my highly developed, superior journalistic instincts, that very few people have. I search for the hidden facts that verify my beliefs, and assert the truth from there. If the facts are not available, I assemble circumstantial evidence. If nothing is available, I claim that my assertion is too important to not be true. Why do you ask?
President Lincoln: Off the record Dan, I am going to send Federal troops to Virginia. I just wanted to know that you will print as truth my assertions about my right to suspend the Constitution because it is too important not to. Do you get the logic there, Dan?
Rather: Uh, yes Sir. Do you have any memos to back that up?
President Lincoln: We are working on that as we speak. Courage Dan.
bump
Is this humor?
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