Skip to comments.Last stop on the geriatric gravy train
Posted on 02/21/2005 12:25:26 PM PST by qam1
Old rockers don't get better with age.
At age 31 the generation gap has finally caught up with me. I just can't relate to the music they play nowadays. To add insult to injury it's my parents who are calling me a has-been. You see, it's not that I'm too old, it's the senior citizen status of the legion of elderly rockers which I can't stand.
Don't think I'm ageist, I'm just embarrassed by the behaviour of these old-timers. I've lost count of the number of performers from the sixties (who are now 60) who have toured Australia recently.
It appears not even death can stop their relentless touring schedule. Sixties icons the Doors are touring Australia, minus lead singer Jim Morrison, who stepped off this mortal coil before I stepped onto it. Photos of the surviving members seem to suggest the remaining Doors have not become unhinged but are clearly antiques. Incidentally they will share a gig with '80s pop sensation Blondie. As Deborah Harry and co are all now pushing 60, perhaps Granny would be a more accurate band title.
Not that these ageing bands are alone in their quest to satisfy the nostalgia of cashed-up baby boomers. To put things in perspective, Australia's just another stop-off for a global industry spearheaded by geriatric touring versions of the Rolling Stones, Tom Jones, the Bald-headed Eagles, and the Retirement Village People to name a few.
I wonder how a lot of these musicians can perform their old catalogue of songs with a straight face. I'd find Rod Stewart singing Do Ya Think I'm Sexy a bit of a stretch. Or what if the Stones launched into a blistering version of Can't get no Satisfaction, wouldn't a more appropriate chorus be "Can't get no Viagra?" Then there's the Doors's passionate tour de force Light My Fire. Surely they now mean fireplace?
Something that irks me about a lot of these concerts is the way they are billed as the "last time" tour. Forgive my cynicism but when you see the same bands put on their last-time tours every other summer you start to ask yourself questions. The almost priceless price of the tickets attached to these tours could be suggestive of a cynical exploitation of a loyal fan base.
But I think I read too much into it. The ticket price may be part of the experience for the fans. Perhaps Cher and the rest jack the price of their seats up to $500 to ensure ageing fans get that nostalgic teenage feeling of barely being able to afford a concert ticket.
Still there's no denying that the music veteran musicians have made is of an excellent quality, better in most cases than the scores of pale imitations you hear today. Surely this must be the key to their longevity. Unlike a fine wine though, I don't see these bands getting better with age. It makes me wonder where it's all going to stop; perhaps we can expect a spin-off Elderly Australian Idol show starting soon.
So maybe I'm past it but I can guarantee you now I'm not going to see the 2050 Guns and Roses Last Time tour.
I think I saw the Rolling Stones "last" tour in '79....
Ping list for the discussion of the politics and social aspects that directly effects Generation-X/Generation Reagan (Those born from 1965-1981) including all the spending previous generations (i.e. The Baby Boomers) are doing that Gen-X and Y will end up paying for.
Hehe...largely true except for the following rockers that I still love to see live:
Ronnie James Dio (age 62)
Ted Nugent (age 56)
Sammy Hagar (age 57)
Poison (early 40s)
Alice Cooper (age 56)
These guys can still crank one out!
I can do without a 59-year old Cher, or a 50-something Bruth Springstheen or a 66 year old Tina Turner, however...
Geriatric rockers are a pretty easy target for a humorist...but that doesn't mean it isn't funny!
You know who looks OLD now? Grace Slick. She looks like she died last year and nobody told her.
But then again, she IS 65...but even in the 80s on the "Nothings Gonna Stop us Now" and "We Built this City" videos she was in her mid 40s and didn't look her age then.
I am at the near end of the baby boom and just got tired of boomer music in the eighties. So I have been exploring the other 1980 years of Western music.
Most definitely. Other older bands that have been touring lately: Motley Crue, Styx, Chicago, Journey (w/o Steve Perry), Heart (only $25 for some shows), REO Speedwagon. Robert Plant is coming out with a new album.
How can this guy say he's not an ageist with a straight face? If there is one thing that I don't understand about my generation is it's total contempt for anyone older. Gen Jones and Gen X obviously took the hippie slogan, "Never trust anyone over 30" a bit too seriously.
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