The blonde puts in a dollar bill and presses the button for "Coke." Out pops a can of Coke and 50 cents change. A man approaches and kindly waits his turn to use the vending machine.
The blonde then puts another dollar bill into the slot and, slightly hesitating, presses the "Pepsi" button. Out pops a can of Pepsi and 50 cents change.
The blonde then rummages through her purse. She pulls out anouther dollar bill and slips it into the vending machine. The blonde pauses for several seconds before making a selection. The man behind her sighs aloud. Paying no attention to the man's impatience, the blonde selects "Mountain Dew." Out pops a can of Mountain Dew and 50 cents change.
The blonde then searches through her purse again and finally finds another dollar bill. She puts it into the vending machine, taking a while to decide which button to push. After a minute or so, the man behind her asks, "Ma'am, how much longer will you be at this machine"?
The blonde turned around and said, "Well...duh!...can't you see I'm winning."
The value of trust in a relationship...
A pastor and his wife are travelling on business. The husband has to return home early. The wife tells him, “Honey, in case I don’t make it back, look in the closet and open the green box.”
So the husband goes home. Curiosity gets a hold of him, and he looks in the closet and opens the box.
His wife gets home, and he confesses. “Honey, I’m sorry, I opened the box. I found three eggs and a stack of $100 bills. I don’t get it.”
His wife said, “Well, dear, over the years, whenever you’ve preached a bad sermon, in other words, “laid an egg”, I would come home and place an egg in this box.”
“That’s great!” said the husband. “Twenty five years of preaching, and only three bad sermons! But...what’s with the stack of $100 bills?”
The wife said, “Well, when you get to a dozen eggs, you gotta sell.”