Posted on 06/12/2009 5:31:14 AM PDT by Lucky9teen
yeah yeah.....heard it all before.....
It's not fair that some teams have a higher salary cap. I think that teams that have a higher amount of money that would use it for extra profits (I mean really, who needs extra profits) should fairly distribute it to the less fortunate teams so they could afford the marquee players. Now that would be a fair angle to professional sports.
You Are Destined to Rule the World |
Which is both kind of cool and kind of scary! Will you rule the world? Maybe. Maybe not. But at least you know that you could. |
HEADLINES FROM THE YEAR 2029
Ozone created by electric cars now killing millions in the seventh largest country in the world, Mexifornia, formerly known as California .
White minorities still trying to have English recognized as Mexifornia’s third language.
Baby conceived naturally! Scientists stumped.
Couple petitions court to reinstate heterosexual marriage.
Iran still closed off; physicists estimate it will take at least 10 more years before radioactivity decreases to safe levels.
France pleads for global help after being taken over by Jamaica. No other country comes forward to help the beleaguered nation!
Castro finally dies at age 112; Cuban cigars can now be imported legally, but President Chelsea Clinton has banned all smoking.
George Z. Bush says he will run for President in 2036.
Postal Service raises price of first class stamp to $17.89 and reduces mail delivery to Wednesdays only.
85-year $75.8 billion study: Diet and exercise is the key to weight loss.
Average weight of Americans drops to 250 lbs.
Global cooling blamed for citrus crop failure for third consecutive year in Mexifornia and Floruba.
Japanese scientists have created a camera with such a fast shutter speed they now can photograph a woman with her mouth shut.
Senate still blocking drilling in ANWR even though gas is selling for 4,532 pesos per liter and gas stations are only open on Tuesdays and Fridays.
Massachusetts executes last remaining conservative.
Supreme Court rules punishment of criminals violates their civil rights.
Average height of NBA players is now nine feet, seven inches.
New federal law requires that all nail clippers, screwdrivers, fly swatters and rolled-up newspapers must be registered by January 2030.
IRS sets lowest tax rate at 75 percent.
Floruba voters still having trouble with voting machines.
I Love This Country! It’s The Government That Scares The Heck Out of Me!
That didn’t even strike me as odd. A side effect from having 3 kids that are gymnasts. Wish I could do that though.
Two medical students were walking down the street and saw an old man walking with his legs apart.
He was stiff legged and walking slowly.
One of the students said to his friend, ‘I’m sure the poor old man has Petry Syndrome. Those people
walk just like that.’
The other student said, ‘No, I don’t think so. The old man surely has Zovitzki Syndrome. He walks slowly
and his legs are apart just as we learned in class.’
Since they couldn’t agree they decided to ask the old man. They approached him and one of the students said to him, ‘We’re medical students and couldn’t help but notice the way you walk, but we couldn’t agree on the syndrome you have. Could you tell us what it is?’
The old man said, ‘I’ll tell you, but first you must tell me what you two fine medical students think.’
One of the students said, ‘I think it’s Petry Syndrome.’
The old man said, ‘You thought.... but you are wrong.’
Then the other student said, ‘I think you have Zovitzki Syndrome.’
The old man said, ‘You are both wrong.’
They asked him, ‘Well, old timer, what do you have?’
The old man said, ‘I thought it was GAS......., but I was wrong too.’
A Czar in every bedroom and a 2-way television set in every living room, comrade.
She’s got healthy... lungs.
You Are Destined to Go To The Ice House |
It's Friday. And the humidity is setting in.
Which is both kind of cool and kind of scary! Will you rule the world? Maybe. Maybe not. But at least you know that you could. |
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