Xenon, being a bit far down on the periodic chart, is a noble gas that has been known to form molecular bonds. It bonds with fluorine, although the solid crystals will explode with a touch of a feather.
The reaction of XeF6 with water can end up giving Xenon Trioxide, a dangerously explosive compound.
So it compounds with Flourine AND Gold, plus it blows stuff up.
Wow, Xenon. You think it's a boring noble gas, but in reality it's the lesbian female assassin of the periodic table.
Life and Times
Rumor has it Xenon was born as the first child of Neon and Helium. Apparently its true form is hideously ugly, and consequently most of its early life was spent locked in the bathroom, refusing to come out. An exception was made when the circus was in town, because then Xenon could put on a mask and blend in. Eventually, Xenon met a cute clown from the circus named Fluorine and fell in love. Despite pressures from the other noble gases, the two went on to have a long-lasting affair during which Fluorine lured Xenon out of the bathroom and into the real world. As soon as Xenon was free, a tragedy occurred. A passing electric current collided with Xenon, and resulted in a massive explosion. This explosion was one of the key factors in creating the solar system.
Some gynecologists, and even a few scientists, are of the opinion that Xenon also had a brief attraction to Oxygen before the tragedy. Needless to say, these people are at odds with the supporters of Xenon actually being Oxygen, with the exception of Ronald McDonald, who is both a scientist and a gynecologist, and who holds both views.
Practical Uses
Xenon had so much pent-up energy from sitting in the bathroom for so long that it has been stored in a large secret facility by the FBI. This energy is dolled out, always for huge amounts of money, to a variety of companies, mainly lamp and camera makers. It is also purportedly being used to create light sabers and other laser-type weapons for the U.S.A. to use in World War III. The government, of course, vehemently denies this.
Xenon can also be used as a rare form of anesthesia. Only one photograph of its true form is known, taken by Andrew G. Werdna. Sadly, the shock of seeing something so horribly disfigured as Xenon caused Andrew to die on the spot. This same effect is used for the anesthetic, being lessened by the fact that it is only a photograph and not the real thing. Patients are shown the picture and immediately pass out. Xenon has also been found leaking out of many time machines, but since nobody really understands time travel, it is unknown whether Xenon is vital to the process.
Properties
Xenon was highly radioactive, which some say led to its decay into nonexistence. Still others say this means that it must have survived the explosion and still be alive, hiding somewhere. This theory is based on the fact that Xenon had a half-life of 16 million years. Xenon also had nine stable isotopes, which it kept in a box in the back of its closet. This collection is the largest of all the elements, except for that of tin’s, which has ten stable isotopes and really likes to show them off.