Posted on 06/16/2011 1:52:54 AM PDT by Cincinatus' Wife
For five years Sean Murphy was driven to distraction by a painful blemish that no amount of creams, ointments or doctors' appointments could cure.
So he came up with his own radical and permament procedure to remove the stubborn wart forever - he blasted it with a 12-bore shotgun.
But not only did the blast take off almost his entire finger, it also left him facing 15 years in jail for the illegal possesion of a firearm.
Yesterday, with only a stump to show for the middle of his left hand, and a suspended 16-week prison sentence, he insisted he had no regrets.
“I’m happy with that,” he said outside Doncaster Magistrates’ Court, South Yorkshire.
“I know I could have gone to jail for up to 15 years for a firearms offence. My solicitor did a very good job.
"The best thing is that the wart has gone. It was giving me lot of trouble.”
Richard Haigh, defending, said Murphy, 38, had been “a victim of his own stupidity when domestic pressures got to him”.
Mr Murphy decided to open fire with the Beretta after fortifying himself with several pints of beer. He settled down outside his caravan, took aim and opened fire.
Police heard about his unconventional treatment and launched an investigation.
Murphy, who lives in the town, told the bench he had found the Beretta under a hedge earlier in the year.
Having decided to use the Beretta, he administered the “anaesthetic” of Yorkshire bitter.
He stretched out his left hand, pointed the end of the barrel at its intended target, and used his other hand to hold the stock steady. Then he pulled the trigger.
Murphy denies that the beer affected his aim. He insists the fault lay with the weapon’s recoil. ....
(Excerpt) Read more at telegraph.co.uk ...
Beer removes warts ping.
Compound W... now available in 3-inch Magnum!
....or hemmeroids.....
Well, the wart’s gone.
Beer keg? Pikers! where’s the jug?!
LOL!
Well i guess luck for him that the wart was not on is head.
A recent “Investor's Business Daily” article provided very interesting statistics from a survey by the United Nations International Health Organization.
Percentage of men and women who survived a cancer five years after diagnosis:
U.S. 65%
England 46%
Canada 42%
Percentage of patients diagnosed with diabetes who received treatment within six months:
U.S. 93%
England 15%
Canada 43%
Percentage of seniors needing hip replacement who received it within six months:
U.S. 90%
England 15%
Canada 43%
Percentage referred to a medical specialist who see one within one month:
U.S. 77%
England 40%
Canada 43%
Number of MRI scanners (a prime diagnostic tool) per million people:
U.S. 71
England 14
Canada 18
Percentage of seniors (65+), with low income, who say they are in “excellent health”:
U.S. 12%
England 2%
Canada 6%
“As an Irish-American”
I also.
How many Irishmen does it take to screw in a light bulb????????Anyone???????Anyone??????
3
One to hold the light bulb.
And two to drink until the room spins.
LOL! I’ll toast to that-it’s 5:00 somewhere!
;)
Hilarious! LOL
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