In dry county where a business is banned from serving alcohol if they choose, Cripplecreek sits in a coffee shop, that only serves decaff (because caffeine has been banned by the local city council), and eating a soy burger because meat has been deemed bad for the environment and digestive system by the local county board. He reaches for the salt but then remembers that has been banned also, and ponders how thankful he is that the government is looking out for his health.
The beautiful sunset is interrupted by the check from the barista, since all restaurants and businesses are ordered to shut their doors at sundown by city ordinance, because well, it's not safe to be out after dark.
He pays the check for his government mandated decaff and government mandated saltless no-meat soy burger, and as he's driving home in his government mandated hybrid car, he says to himself:
"Isn't freedom wonderful?"
Geez...do they ALWAYS take pix of this power-mad control freak from the floor?