Build a man a fire and he will be warm for the night.
Set him on fire and he will be warm for the rest of his life.
...and we can’t forget this one:
Eastern Poland, 1921. A small town rabbi, knowing he will die soon, decides that he must taste pork before it all ends.
He knows he cannot eat in town, so he travels 50 miles away to a place where no one knows him. He sits down, and orders the suckling pig.
After 20 minutes, they bring out a pig on a beautiful platter, surrounded by potatoes, and an apple in his mouth. As the rabbi is set to take his first bite, in walks Goldberg, the president of his congregation, who says: “Rabbi, what is this??”
The rabbi looks up and says: “Incredible. I ordered a baked apple, and THIS is how they serve it!”