The penile mittens w/ DNC logo are the most coveted souvenir of Obama's inaug.
Seems Planned Parenthood took a survey and found that women intensely dislike cold penises. PP brought the survey to Michele Obama who agreed totally. Mrs O then ordered the DNC to offer the penile mittens as souvenirs to Democrat inaug attendees.
The penile mittens come in size small, medium, and large,or, as they are known to the politically correct ----- Winky, Weeny and Wowee.
In case you're wondering:
Winky fits 2" penis
Weeny fits 3" penis
Wowee fits 5-6" penis--has heavy duty elasticized closure
guaranteed not to cutoff circulation to the Democrat's member.
Mrs O would not say which size she got for Obama---but when asked the question---she winked.
To celebrata Obama's reelection as president of the Fully Fornicating Society, Sandra held a contest to determine "Which Democrat Can Last the Longest."
Female Democrat interns also participated.
The Planned Condom Detail made sure every Democrat is properly sheathed. PP monitored each event with an Olympic-approved stopwatch.
Harry Reid's in a snit b/c he was disqualified from the competion. Harry's bummed b/c he was disqualified on a technicality----he doesn't take his glasses off when having sex---and needs mega-doses of Viagra to get the action going.
Alan Grayson got in shape by abstaining for six months (couldn't get anybody to have sex with him, if the truth be told).
Joe Biden begged off b/c he had several dates lined up the evening of the inaugural and couldn't spend the time..... or energy.
Obama was willing to participate despite his many duties---but Michele told him, "Back off suckah, or yo' head gonna look funnier'n it does now."
Jesse Jacksoon Jr volunteered to come out of rehab to participate---for a bit of diversity---but his daddy volunteered instead......to keep his boy safe from media scrutiny.
Ping to #8. Funny!