My wife and I went thru some tough years about then, too. We are now at 22 years and happier than ever.
I’d advise:
Make sure she knows you are committed to the relationship no matter what. Make her feel secure.
Put the kids first. (With kids, you’ll deal with her for the next 20 years together or apart.)
Woo her again. Life’s not fair. She should be an equal partner, but if she’s not, she’s still the gatekeeper to your kids.
Woo her friends. Have then telling her what a great guy she has. (Have a surprise party for her and her friends, cook, serve, let them do girl stuff, then make yourself scarce. Or arrange a spa day with her and her friends.)
Put the WIFE first. Putting the kids first is where problems arise.