Posted on 09/19/2013 6:44:56 PM PDT by Morgana
I was cleaning out my Gmail folders today and had a peek inside the one called C-Word. Its a sub-folder in my Hatey-Hatey-Hate folder, where I keep the hate mail in which someone has called me a c-word.
And just now the episode of 30 Rock came on where Liz Lemon gets called a c-word, and I figured it was a sign that I needed to write this post, and share with you all the sound, logical arguments anti-lifers hurl at people when they think no one is watching.
So here they are: my top five favorite insults people have sent me via hate mail. (All punctuation and spelling mistakes have been left intact, for accuracy and comedy.)
5. You should have been aborted.
This is an old stand-by. They think its reeeeally gonna sting. Oooh, not only do you think some people should be aborted, you think Im one of them?! See how my tears fall gently upon my rosary.
All this comment does is prove the person loves abortion for the same reason we claim and they deny: to rid the world of people they find unacceptable. Its not really about liberating women. Its not really a difficult and tragic choice. Its the curtailment of the undesirable. Its a way of avoiding people wed rather not have in our lives.
4. Hey guess what did you know the TRUTH is that many studies haveshown that the more UNATTRACTVE a woman is the more likely she will oppose abortion and reproductive rights for women and this is a fact.
In other words: youre against abortion because youre ugly. Ive been told Im against abortion because Im frigid, a secret virgin, and unwanted by all men. But ugly was new.
I almost feel sorry for abortion advocates sometimes. They have the law, but we have morality, ethics, science, and logic. Its inevitable that they occasionally resort to Oh yeah? Well youre ugly.
3. I feel sorry for your husband. I feel sorry for anyone who has to live with you. You are living, breathing proof that Christianity turns intelligent women into intolerable ones.
Bonus points, first of all, for literacy. But sorry to disappoint you, Gloria Steinem: Im awesome to live with! Ask my husband. I sing songs from Grease while cooking in my underpants. I burn Bath & Bodyworks candles twenty-four hours a day. I watch Friends every single time its on. I vacuum occasionally. Whos intolerable now, lady?
Unfortunately, it was not Christianity that brainwashed me into being pro-life. It was all that ethical, scientific, and logical stuff I mentioned above. Maybe one day it will enter your life and make you intolerable, too.
2. Your blogs are the wrost I have ever read on the internet and that is saying a lot. How can you be so judgemental? Just because everyones life is not as perfect yours, apparently. You are a bad writer and I hope your are not getting paid for this because someone is getting ripped off.
The writer of this insult went on to mention specific points from several of my posts with which he took issue. I dont know about you, but if I were to stumble across the wrost blog I had ever read on the Internet (as opposed to all those non-Internet blogs we happen across regularly), Id probably I dunno stop reading it?
If I were that bad of a writer, how did I engage you so thoroughly that you kept reading my blog posts despite hating them with all your heart? Check and mate, home slice.
1. You [expletive] make me laugh so [expletive] hard, [expletive]. You [expletive]. You [expletive] [expletive]. Everything that comes out of your [expletive] mouth is [expletive]. You [expletive] a [expletive] [expletive], you stupid [expletive] [expletive].
You know what? You got me.
Seriously, I got nothing. Your argument absolutely shook me to my core and made me reevaluate everything Ive ever thought or written. I think it was around the third f-word, or maybe the second c-word, that I started to realize how profoundly wrong Ive been about the sanctity of life.
Thank you for opening my eyes.
Believe it or not, this last insult had a happy ending: my hate mail reply form letter amused this writer so thoroughly that she ended up apologizing, and we had a civil and somewhat enriching back-and-forth about life, the universe, and everything.
The moral of this story is either something really heart-warming about human beings connecting despite their differences, or to save all your hate mail because theres probably a lot of hilarious stuff in it.
Remember a few days ago that story about the ritual killing of a chicken at a Jewish rite? So, save the chickens but kill the kids.
My wife got her first hate mail today from a liberal. The lib got her email off a comment over at The Blaze.
“You’re just another typical white trash conservative! It’s white trash conservatives like yourself that give Americans a bad name. Fans of theblaze.com and followers of Michelle Malkin are ignorant fools, and the definition of human waste. You albino skinned cave ape, get a real job you dumb c###! And for god sakes use a condom! F### YOU.”
Yea that came over her personal email. The original was not censored. And yet somehow we are the haters...
Wow! Very interesting question.
This one made me laugh!
Does this count?
Liberals are such knowledgeable and classy people.
They are. A vet can and often does do dog and cat abortions.
You’re strong, Morgana.
You brought us much info about that despicable abortionist Grosnell. I don’t know how you kept food in your stomach during that.
May God bless you for all you have done (and are putting up with).
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