Posted on 12/20/2013 5:15:05 AM PST by Lucky9teen
You were right the first time. Ask any self respecting liberal and he was John F'n God.
An old man in his mid-seventies struggles to get up from the couch then starts putting on his coat.
His wife, seeing the unexpected behaviour, asks, Where are you going?’
He replies, ‘I’m going to the doctor.’
She says, ‘Why, are you sick?’
He says, ‘Nope, I’m going to get me some of that Viagra stuff.’
Immediately the wife starts working and positioning herself to get out of her rocker and begins to put on her coat.
He says, ‘Where the heck are you going’?
She answers, ‘I’m going to the doctor, too.’
He says, ‘Why, what do you need?’
She says, ‘If you’re going to start using that rusty old thing, I’m getting a Tetanus shot
Looks like the “3” should be a “4” as in a 3-4-5 triangle.
So, you don't seem to dislike him as much as the rest of us. C'mon, get with it!
A plane is on its way to Detroit when a blonde woman in economy class gets up and moves into an open seat in the first class section.
The flight attendant watches her do this, and politely informs the woman that she must sit in economy class because that's the type of ticket she paid for.
The blonde replies, "I'm blonde, I'm beautiful, I'm going to Detroit and I'm staying right here."
After repeated attempts and no success at convincing the woman to move, the flight attendant goes into the cockpit and informs the pilot and co-piolet that there's a blonde bimbo sitting in first class who refuses to go back to her proper seat. The co-pilot goes back to the woman and explains why she needs to move, but once again the woman replies by saying, "I'm blonde, I'm beatiful, I'm going to Detroit and I'm staying right here."
The co-pilot returns to the cockpit and suggests that perhaps they should have the arrival gate call the police and have the woman arrested when they land. The pilot says, "You say she's blonde? I'll handle this. I'm married to a blonde. I speak blonde." He goes back to the woman and whispers quietly in her ear, and she says, "Oh, I'm sorry," then quickly moves back to her seat in economy class.
The flight attendant and co-pilot are amazed and ask him what he said to get her to move back to economy without causing any fuss.
"I told her first class isn't going to Detroit."
Hehe ...oldie but a goodie.
Yep. I’d give the student a “pass” for providing a benevolent answer to a badly presented problem. (Instead of calling the teacher a rightly-deserved dipsh!t.)
Merry CHRISTmas to you too ,Lucky!
The Boston Picture was a tough one to solve.
And here I am, just coming in...
I was so late that my other pings hid this one. *sigh*
But NOW, I can enjoy the thread! Thanks for posting this, and have a very joyous Christmas!
‘Face
well said!
That was SO perfect!
That’s a good one!!
GHOTI = Fish (per George Bernard Shaw)
GH sounds like “f” in Tough
O as in the “i” sound plural Women
TI as in the “sh” sound in motion.
Or as the English folk philosopher, Dr Samuel Johnson once said - “Never trust a man (or woman in your case) who only knows how to spell a word one way”.
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