“I’m going to cash in on conspiracy theory novels. Fools love to part with their money. The first one will involve Fukushima, Obama, and Director Fuddy.
It’s easy. Clearly Obama was behind the Fukushima meltdown. Radiating the Pacific would be a good way to shake investigators away from Hawaii. Fuddy, in addition to vouching for Obama’s Hawaiian birth, knew all about this diabolical plan so clearly she had to go. After months of brainstorming the simplest way to get rid of her, Obama’s hit men settled on staging a plane crash in the ocean where she would be the only fatality.
Isn’t it obvious? “
So you’re implying that all the rest were as Martin Short used to say, “strong swimmers” in both the sea and the persuasive tides of politics. That the only one surprised and altogether adrift was Fuddy? Maybe the others were given an assignment they could not refuse.
Of course...
"OK guys. Here's the plan. It's the best we could come up with. We've got to get rid of Fuddy. She's been running around telling the whole world that President Obama was born in Hawaii and the boss isn't too happy about this. So what we've came up with is, we're going to put you all in an airplane and crash it into the Pacific. Don't worry. You'll be fine. We've got a great pilot. Now once you all safely swim away from the wreckage, you need to make sure Fuddy dies from what looks like natural causes. I dunno, a heart attack or something. Are you all with me? This is going to work perfectly! Yeah, I know we can't get a simple website up and running but you gotta trust us on this! Nobody will suspect a thing!"
Good grief. Really?