OMGosh. My car is stranded in the latest storm out on our hill. I had to walk on up the hill home. I am still shaking. My car would skid a little and the anti-lock brakes kept coming on....never did that to me before. I came to a complete stop on the steepest part of the hill. Nothing to do after that. I am still shaking.
Glad you are ok.
Newer cars have stability or traction control. This is designed to stop the wheels from spinning.
On the snow you sometimes need the wherls to spin so you need to turn this off.
I had to turn the “ESC” off in my wife’s car the other day to get it up the driveway.
http://justgivemethedamnmanual.com/toyota/toyota-highlander-owners-manuals/
I am not sure what year yours is, but there is a “TRAC OFF” button on the 2007 model, located to the right of the steering wheel on the dash.
How terrifying!! Thank goodness you are ok!