Posted on 03/22/2014 10:32:07 AM PDT by fredhead
Somewhere there’s a dog in a shelter that needs your love. And he will return the favor many times over.
Good luck to you.
Here’s something that always helps me and maybe it will work for you, too.
Think of a time in the future when all of your current troubles are behind you. The divorce is over with and you have been left enough money to support yourself. You can see now that you’re going to be OK. Whenever you’re downhearted, think about that picture of yourself in the future, with everything getting better, the bad times over.
Work a little harder and longer and smarter at your job and see if you can find extra pleasure in what you do well. Remember and treasure every compliment you ever got, every friendship you ever made. Remember challenges of the past that you’ve successfully overcome. Review your strengths and remember good times ... look forward to more good times.
Four words to keep firmly in mind when life gets hard, as it does for all of us: This, too, shall pass.
Suicide is NOT an option. How can one ask for forgiveness for doing the sin “Thou shalt not kill” when one is already dead?
I definitely don’t want to spend eternity in the “infernal regions.”
Give thanks to God for what you’ve had, and what you still have. You had the lifelong love and companionship of a gentle creature, that dog, who left this world in the one place he or she most wanted to be. You have a job. You have a life to live. Pray for help with your burdens, lift them up to Him in all humble sincerity. Look for ways to economize, look for ways to help cover your overhead that do not involve money. You’ll make it. You have not been forsaken. Late 2007 to mid-2008 was similar for me, it’s very difficult I know. The peace of God from prayer, stepping back and assessing what you do still have and how to proceed, then putting one foot in front of the other until you see your way clear of your troubles, it’s all you can do. There are so many sweet dogs needing a person to love and care for them, when it’s time you’ll know, take in another.
Going to be praying for you, fredhead. God bless you.
I promise God hasn’t deserted you. He is right there. If you can praise Him even in the storm, and pour out your heart to Him, you WILL get through this. I know from experience.
No children.
Returned from Gulf War I after being away for seven months to find his wife involved with a guy. . .
Hey brother, I understand.
God IS there with you through this. And He WILL SEE you through this!!
I went through this public ‘raping’. Yes, the lawyers and the ex all get together and rape the big, bad man - stealing EVERYTHING he’s got in the world and leaving him bloodied and alone.
Mine dragged out for two years. I went through 2 lawyers. I would advise ANY man who gets divorced by his wife to not bother with a lawyer. They’re just ANOTHER party who wants as much of your money as they can get. PERIOD.
My ex was smart and I was just plain stupid and naive.
I’d been a mailman and then worked for a title insurance office making around 30k/yr. When I got laid off, she announced the divorce.
I then found myself in a pretty successful musical show which went to Broadway for 8 months. Somehow, the divorce FILING didn’t happen til AFTER the show died and I was let go -3 years later.
It didn’t matter that for ONE year, I out-earned her. I had tripled my salary and they clobbered me, but good.
My lawyer had mistaken me for a long-term Broadway actor and got VERY upset and ugly with me by the time of our final judgment. All because he finally realized the truth - that I was NOT some big money guy.
I was forced to go live at my mothers again - an hour away from my kids. This made it VERY hard for my ‘parenting’ time: every other weekend. Especially when my daughter has dance up in her town all weekend. Whatever savings I was allowed to keep just got eaten up. I was broke, homeless and unemployed.
It was miserable and I thought I’d never recover. The judgment was in Sept. 2012 and I still have my moments.
Brother, I lost EVERYTHING - except God. And He got my attention.
I’ve since found work long enough to have gotten a house of my own. Currently, I’m laid off and, like I said, have my moments of wondering if I’m gonna lose it all over again.
I also met a wonderful girl who actually LOVES me and so I just married her. So I’m not alone anymore.
Life is never easy for very long. But God is my provider, my protector and the one who cares about me more than ANYONE.
He is all that for you too. Feel free to contact me if you need to talk.
I went through terrible times as well. It helped to pray constantly for the grace to make the right choices and find forgiveness. I took a second job that involved being around a lot of people, which was a huge help. Those times taught me to live in small increments and look for fellowship wherever it was offered. I feel much freer now than I would have, unafraid, and grateful. Also have a close friend, former navy type, who went through a terrible divorce after 35 yrs of marriage last year. We were worried for his survival at the time, but this year he just told us that “Life is Good!” Give it time. There is a lesson in this for you. Meanwhile, you have our prayers.
Shaking your fist at the wind doesn’t help.
But the knowledge of the Word of God and what He says about these things and what He is doing and will do for you and on your behalf, does help.
Contact local Vet organizations VFW, American Legion and see if they have a fund for lawyer help. Call around and see for Legal Aid help and Pro Bono.
How about your Church? My church has lawyers, doctors, all walks of life folks. They also have financial fund for help.
The year I got divorced, I got Strep throat twice with severe bacterial infection and was hospitalized for 5 days, had a car accident, got a nail in my foot, couldn’t get my things out of storage even with a Judge order because they cop I called to escort me said, Oh it has to be an original signature not a copy of the order”. There were more things then that- but it was the year from hell. Happily remarried for 30 years and ex husband is still unemployed, a loser, who is stealing from his elderly mother. Life has been good for me, him, eh, not so much. Oh he was a wife beater by the way, beat me when I was 7mos pregnant. Our son was born with mental disabilities due to this.. So I have so had my share of heartaches, hard-times. But the Lord was always there and walked my through it all...like he will you.
Any ways- Read the Psalms, so powerful, kept me strong through so many things.
I would file for bankruptcy if you can. If your credit is taking a hit now, what difference does it make to just do bankruptcy.
I know you are lonely- give it sometime. Keep busy, join a Church divorce group. Don’t let the devil win by making you feel like you are never get through this, reject his power over you and your situation.
I will pray over your situation. Keep us posted.
Bitcoins? ... :-) ...
Oh, well then...
Fred, Seek after God and do all the things you’ve always enjoyed doing. Find things that make you laugh.
Your marriage ended but the world didn’t.
You’ll be alright. It’s like having surgery - it is painful and recovery seems to take forever. But soon, you’ll look back and give a HUGH sigh of relief. And you’ll smile again.
We promise!
Praying for you, my FRiend.
I am so sorry for your loss.
((((HUGS))))
ML
Prayers for you. I know it seems very bleak now, but know that He has a plan for you. Sometimes it seems like God is not listening to our prayers, but He is.
Even this shall pass.
God loves you.
BTW, I know nothing about the law, so perhaps some FReeper who does can advise you on where to get some pro-bono help.
Already a bright spot. Keep up the good work!
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