As young as I can remember, I never believed in either.
As young as I can remember, I asked my mom, how could Santa fit down our chimney? since we had coal furnace, and I had a conception of the whole thing. She replied in exasperation, that he didn’t come down the chimney, but came in the front door. It was in that moment that I knew, more from the tone of her voice than anything else.
Well, so be it. My grandkids are so much more sophisiticated than I was at their age, yet they are still naive in so many ways. It’s a magical time, and let it take its course.
I remember the moment it clicked, realizing that it was Mom and Dad all along who were responsible for creating the silhouettes of those stacks of Christmas presents I was seeing up on the living room drapes. Another thought occurred- That this could be how it happens in everyone else’s house. I went back to bed a changed man and it felt good to know that I hade made the discovery on my own. Suddenly, I was a BIG boy! It changed the world for me, and all because I had to get up to pee...AND I remember holding it as long as I could before risking it, for I didn’t want to have Santa catch me up and around when I was supposed to be sleeping.
Eventually, I got up again and was there to tell my parents all about it. They acknowledged their role but warned me not to tell my younger 3 year-old brother. From then on, I had the trust of my parents to keep their secret safe for the sake of my little brother and a handful of still-believing cousins whose parents were also the “Santa Claus” at their house. I could really see how it worked at Grandma and Grandpa’s and nobody tried to talk me out of it so I correctly assumed that I was on the right track. I was the newest member of a club who knew what the big secret was...How cool!