Posted on 02/10/2017 2:19:30 PM PST by nickcarraway
A Texas family had the last laugh against a less-than-beloved relative when they published a brutally honest obituary that "proves that evil does in fact die."
The family of late Galveston man Leslie Ray Charping published an obituary on the website of Carnes Funeral Home that declined to pull any punches after the man died at the age of 75 -- "which was 29 years longer than expected and much longer than he deserved."
The obituary says Charping "leaves behind two relieved children" as well as "six grandchildren and countless other victims including an ex wife, relatives, friends, neighbors, doctors, nurses and random strangers."
"At a young age, Leslie quickly became a model example of bad parenting combined with mental illness and a complete commitment to drinking, drugs, womanizing and being generally offensive," the obituary reads.
The family says Charping was "surprisingly intelligent," but failed to find professional success due to a lack of ambition and motivation.
"Leslie's hobbies included being abusive to his family, expediting trips to heaven for the beloved family pets, and fishing, which he was less skilled with than the previously mentioned. Leslie's life served no other obvious purpose, he did not contribute to society or serve his community and he possessed no redeeming qualities besides quick [witted] sarcasm, which was amusing during his sober days.
With Leslie's passing he will be missed only for what he never did; being a loving husband, father and good friend. No services will be held, there will be no prayers for eternal peace and no apologizes to the family he tortured. Leslie's remains will be cremated and kept in the barn until "Ray", the family donkey's wood shavings run out. Leslie's passing proves that evil does in fact die and hopefully marks a time of healing and safety for all."
LMAO!
CC
They could have had a really enjoyable wake.
Celebrating the passing instead of the life that went before.
His nick name was “Mister Nice Guy”.
Dayum. I wonder why they were even around to see his passing or spend the money to cremate him. It certainly couldn’t have been for the wealth he didn’t possess that had them waiting to receive. Evil hasn’t died though. Just the evil that they knew all too intimately.
Hmm...you know, I’m catching some negative vibes there. Oh, nothing in particular...
My uncles co-workers at the coal mine said none of ‘em thought he’d live long enough to die of natural causes.
Here’s the text from the funeral home, instead of the UPI’s hack job:
Leslie Ray “Popeye” Charping was born in Galveston on November 20, 1942 and passed away January 30, 2017, which was 29 years longer than expected and much longer than he deserved. Leslie battled with cancer in his latter years and lost his battle, ultimately due to being the horses ass he was known for. He leaves behind 2 relieved children; a son Leslie Roy Charping and daughter, Shiela Smith along with six grandchildren and countless other victims including an ex wife, relatives, friends, neighbors, doctors, nurses and random strangers.
At a young age, Leslie quickly became a model example of bad parenting combined with mental illness and a complete commitment to drinking, drugs, womanizing and being generally offensive. Leslie enlisted to serve in the Navy, but not so much in a brave & patriotic way but more as part of a plea deal to escape sentencing on criminal charges. While enlisted, Leslie was the Navy boxing champion and went on to sufficiently embarrass his family and country by spending the remainder of his service in the Balboa Mental Health Hospital receiving much needed mental healthcare services.
Leslie was surprisingly intelligent, however he lacked ambition and motivation to do anything more than being reckless, wasteful, squandering the family savings and fantasizing about get rich quick schemes. Leslie’s hobbies included being abusive to his family, expediting trips to heaven for the beloved family pets and fishing, which he was less skilled with than the previously mentioned. Leslie’s life served no other obvious purpose, he did not contribute to society or serve his community and he possessed no redeeming qualities besides quick whited sarcasm which was amusing during his sober days.
With Leslie’s passing he will be missed only for what he never did; being a loving husband, father and good friend. No services will be held, there will be no prayers for eternal peace and no apologizes to the family he tortured. Leslie’s remains will be cremated and kept in the barn until “Ray”, the family donkey’s wood shavings run out. Leslie’s passing proves that evil does in fact die and hopefully marks a time of healing and safety for all.
WOW! That’s An Obit!
Sounds like my ex father in law, he had some redeeming qualities I suppose, he was (unknown to us husbands) hated by his 5 daughters which became clear to him about 5 minutes before he stuck his shotgun in his mouth, the next day it became clear to all of the son-in-laws when that closet door came open.
“I wonder why they were even around to see his passing or spend the money to cremate him.”
To make sure the SOB was dead and stayed that way.
You are probably right. But a simple identification would have confirmed that. 8>)
The Obit is very amusing and clever, but the family may have been better off saying nothing at all. This piece is wall to wall bitterness, displayed to the public. Someone’s been waiting a long time to air this dirty laundry.
I had a business acquaintance who passed away a dozen years ago. His wife wrote the obituary I suppose because one line of it read, “He loved good Scotch Whisky, Jazz Music and his wife, in that order.”
I didn’t get to go to the funeral, but I knew him as entertaining and not too serious, so I hope it all went well.
That’s not the first time this has happened, btw. There was another obit - or maybe even a tombstone - that related information on the evil person buried.
I must say that as the daughter of a terrible mother I gloated over these stories in the past. But I refused to allow my lesser self to be guided by them. The past should remain the past and I have my dear father’s memory to consider.
Let the dead bury the dead, Mr. Finch.
Irishman Dies from Stubbornness, Whiskey
Chris Connors died, at age 67, after trying to box his bikini-clad hospice nurse just moments earlier. Ladies man, game slayer, and outlaw Connors told his last inappropriate joke on Friday, December 9, 2016, that which cannot be printed here. Anyone else fighting ALS and stage 4 pancreatic cancer would have gone quietly into the night, but Connors was stark naked drinking Veuve in a house full of friends and family as Al Green played from the speakers. The way he died is just like he lived: he wrote his own rules, he fought authority and he paved his own way. And if you said he couldn’t do it, he would make sure he could.
Most people thought he was crazy for swimming in the ocean in January; for being a skinny Irish Golden Gloves boxer from Quincy, Massachusetts; for dressing up as a priest and then proceeding to get into a fight at a Jewish deli. Many gawked at his start of a career on Wall Street without a financial background - but instead with an intelligent, impish smile, love for the spoken word, irreverent sense of humor, and stunning blue eyes that could make anyone fall in love with him.
As much as people knew hanging out with him would end in a night in jail or a killer screwdriver hangover, he was the type of man that people would drive 16 hours at the drop of a dime to come see. He lived 1000 years in the 67 calendar years we had with him because he attacked life; he grabbed it by the lapels, kissed it, and swung it back onto the dance floor. At the age of 26 he planned to circumnavigate the world - instead, he ended up spending 40 hours on a life raft off the coast of Panama. In 1974, he founded the Quincy Rugby Club. In his thirties, he sustained a knife wound after saving a woman from being mugged in New York City. He didn’t slow down: at age 64, he climbed to the base camp of Mount Everest. Throughout his life, he was an accomplished hunter and birth control device tester (with some failures, notably Caitlin Connors, 33; Chris Connors, 11; and Liam Connors, 8).
He was a rare combination of someone who had a love of life and a firm understanding of what was important - the simplicity of living a life with those you love. Although he threw some of the most memorable parties during the greater half of a century, he would trade it all for a night in front of the fire with his family in Maine. His acute awareness of the importance of a life lived with the ones you love over any material possession was only handicapped by his territorial attachment to the remote control of his Sonos music.
Chris enjoyed cross dressing, a well-made fire, and mashed potatoes with lots of butter. His regrets were few, but include eating a rotisserie hot dog from an unmemorable convenience store in the summer of 1986.
Of all the people he touched, both willing and unwilling, his most proud achievement in life was marrying his wife Emily Ayer Connors who supported him in all his glory during his heyday, and lovingly supported him physically during their last days together.
Absolut vodka and Simply Orange companies are devastated by the loss of Connors. A “Celebration of Life” will be held during Happy Hour (4 p.m.) at York Harbor Inn on Monday, December 19.
In lieu of flowers, please pay open bar tab or donate to Connors’ water safety fund at www.thechrisconnorsfund.com.
He didn’t sound all That Bad!
Especially once they saw the stake in his chest.
8>)
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