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The Single Life: Where Do We Go From Here?
Public Discourse ^ | 04/22/2014 | Carissa Mulder

Posted on 04/23/2017 8:43:56 PM PDT by BJ1

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To: Dilbert San Diego

I don’t agree with this premise. I see blue collar guys all over our middle class community becoming engaged and marrying college graduate gals. My son being one. Heck I see graduate school women involved with blue collar and skilled trades guys.

I think it is wonderful that these millennils are finding their loves. BTW most of them of devoutly religious.


41 posted on 04/24/2017 3:42:30 AM PDT by Chickensoup (Leftists today are speaking as if they plan to commence to commit genocide against conservatives.)
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To: ransomnote

Interned in a college counseling center in the nineties. Noted same hook up issues and worked with many a young woman who had serial sexual encounters and “felt bad” and did not understand why. These young women expected that they would feel as they had been trained, in school and by the culture, that sex was a bit like sneezing. Not that it was a precious part of them and a path for attachment and love.

there were so many of these women and it boiled down to their inability to conceive of and state the word “No.”

These women had not been taught by mothers and grandmothers that they were to be fussy and were able to say No to any and all encounters if they wished. The young women had the attitude: Well I am not a virgin and he wants sex and it would be mean or uncooperative to withhold sex, because I really don’t have a reason to ...
this is what their culture had taught them via schooling and media. (there are times I perfectly well understand the disgust the Islamics have for Western culture)

I proposed holding groups for the young women on campus teaching them that their body was their own and that they had the option of saying no to sex. That proposal was shot down by the university and the head of the counseling center because it might be “judgmental”

As if life was not a series of judgments.

Young women today have been traumatized by the culture.


42 posted on 04/24/2017 4:00:55 AM PDT by Chickensoup (Leftists today are speaking as if they plan to commence to commit genocide against conservatives.)
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To: MrEdd

with the current culture even those who are married can find themselves alone and unloved as they age.


43 posted on 04/24/2017 4:03:11 AM PDT by Chickensoup (Leftists today are speaking as if they plan to commence to commit genocide against conservatives.)
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To: BJ1
Malachi 2:14-15
14 Yet ye say, Wherefore? Because theLord hath been witness between thee and the wife of thy youth, against whom thou hast dealt treacherously: yet is she thy companion, and the wife of thy covenant.
15 And did not he make one? Yet had he the residue of the spirit. And wherefore one? That he might seek a godly seed. Therefore take heed to your spirit, and let none deal treacherously against the wife of his youth.
44 posted on 04/24/2017 4:05:11 AM PDT by Theophilus (Repent)
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To: ground_fog

Why would you call a woman who is a wife and homemaker a slave?

There are plenty of women who enjoy a traditional role in the home.

I have a young friend who hopes for the same.


45 posted on 04/24/2017 4:05:32 AM PDT by Chickensoup (Leftists today are speaking as if they plan to commence to commit genocide against conservatives.)
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To: Dilbert San Diego

Most women (note the word “most”) will not marry someone who makes less than they do.

Or that works at a less prestigious job than they do. A doctor will not marry a man who owns a garbage business, even though he may be worth much more than she is.


46 posted on 04/24/2017 4:55:07 AM PDT by redgolum
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To: aquila48

#3 is actually viewed as a negative in many fields. I have been told “Well, you would be good at job X, but you have a family so we went with the divorced guy.”

First time it happened it made me angry. 20th time I realized that if the requirement was that you have no family, it wasn’t a job I wanted.


47 posted on 04/24/2017 5:04:47 AM PDT by redgolum
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To: BJ1; metmom

ping


48 posted on 04/24/2017 5:11:19 AM PDT by mad_as_he$$ ("Where there is smoke, there is Susan Rice." Lee Carter, FBN, 4/6/2017)
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To: cherry
Unintentional consequences (Intentional for some) and the side-effects of feminism is the destruction of the strong male role-model. Men exerting their masculinity get punished in society, ergo masculine identity is now frowned upon in the real world. "Games" that are focused on victory have been replaced by "equal outcome" BS. Competition is contained through sanctioned organizations where "inequality" is still being picked on. This has been going on since the 50's as academia/pop-culture focused more on destroying "Western" values. The final vestige of masculinity which lies in the military is now under attack in order to comply with femininity. This is your outcome when you break down culture and turn it into a feminist nightmare/State.

Service economy induced by globalism has created an economic rift similar of the agricultural - industrial rift. In the past, men who would not go onto college could find jobs and skill-sets that could provide for the family. Expansive government, outsourcing/offshoring, and other factors has been shrinking those options. The focus of academia has been on female empowerment and neutering masculinity. A Christian male expounding on the virtues of submission to God/Biblical commands of matrimony would be ridiculed endlessly, you mean women must submit to their husbands, that is barbaric.

Video games or any other hobby can be destructive if they consume most of your free time. Men had hobbies for eons used to decompress so not sure what your point is there.

Females were once considered gateways to society. When you have females that choose (Strongly aided by pop-culture and female empowerment) to become vapid sluts (Well educated ones are too) and constantly ride the cock carousel, the natural tendency of men would be to enjoy the ride while not getting emotionally attached. Also huge culprits are No-fault divorce/welfare state.
49 posted on 04/24/2017 5:13:20 AM PDT by rollo tomasi (Working hard to pay for deadbeats and corrupt politicians.)
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To: ground_fog

Sure, make an assumption about a marriage from a short paragraph. How do you know what I have and what you want? It’s a Biblical marriage — I have my role and she has hers. If you don’t want that, that’s fine, but don’t pretend it’s just different, because it is clearly better than a non-Biblical one.


50 posted on 04/24/2017 5:17:27 AM PDT by SarahPalin2012
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To: BJ1

Hey, I have a college degree and mr. mm doesn’t.

He’s the primary bread winner, always has been, and I’m what he once called *hopelessly domestic*.

Sure I could have gone out and supported myself. Matter of fact, I had 10 years in at the company I worked at, enough for a pension, when I quit to get married and be a stay at home wife and mother. I finished up my degree so that if anything happened to mr. mm I would be marketable with a college degree and 10 years of work experience.

We homeschooled our kids and ALL three of them have finished college and are working on graduate degrees.

The problem isn’t so much a lack of marriageable men but the expectations that everyone goes into marriage with and the entitlement mentality BOTH sides have.


51 posted on 04/24/2017 6:39:54 AM PDT by metmom ( ...fixing our eyes on Jesus, the Author and Perfecter of our faith...)
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To: DesertRhino
Hell, we even get better looking as we age.


52 posted on 04/24/2017 6:42:31 AM PDT by metmom ( ...fixing our eyes on Jesus, the Author and Perfecter of our faith...)
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To: BJ1
I have often thought about this. I get it, the guys don’t want to marry a woman that is easy. However, the culture being what it is, aren’t men just finding a similar woman later in life? In other words, the nice girl men are settling down with, were promiscuous in their college years/early 20s.

Likewise, if men want women who are pure, women want men like that too.

If men have no trouble with sleeping around and *banging* girls, why would it bother them to marry a woman who thought and acted like that too?

That's a double standard and women DO. NOT. LIKE. IT.

It's called *hypocrisy*.

53 posted on 04/24/2017 6:50:18 AM PDT by metmom ( ...fixing our eyes on Jesus, the Author and Perfecter of our faith...)
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To: metmom

you laugh because it’s true right?


54 posted on 04/24/2017 6:50:53 AM PDT by BJ1
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To: Chickensoup; ground_fog

You’re damned if you do and damned if you don’t.


55 posted on 04/24/2017 6:54:24 AM PDT by metmom ( ...fixing our eyes on Jesus, the Author and Perfecter of our faith...)
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To: BJ1

Bald and beer belly?

If that’s an improvement, then it’s no wonder women aren’t interested in marrying either and would rather support themselves.

IOW, wrong.


56 posted on 04/24/2017 6:59:18 AM PDT by metmom ( ...fixing our eyes on Jesus, the Author and Perfecter of our faith...)
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To: metmom

>>> Likewise, if men want women who are pure, women want men like that too.

If men have no trouble with sleeping around and *banging* girls, why would it bother them to marry a woman who thought and acted like that too?

That’s a double standard and women DO. NOT. LIKE. IT.<<<

I am not sure how many men want a pure wife that is a virgin. Sadly the reality is that hardly any husband or wife is so when they get married. So it’s not something to be expected for most.

But you can easily find guys on the manosphere lamenting women’s nature for 1) Banging the bad boy types in their 20s then suddenly when a woman hits the wall and hears her biological clock ticking she wants a nice guy to provide for her, future kids and to be loyal to her. 2) Why should the nice guy take the risk of getting destroyed financially and emotionally in a divorce for something this same woman was giving away for free to bad boys?

Yeah the guys have a double standard. They are stupid if they can’t see that banging some girl is wrong as she is some other man’s future wife. However, their reaction to having a slut for a bride/mother of his kids is reasonable don’t you think? I would have never chosen a woman who was promiscuous when I was looking to get remarried.

In the world we live in, who’s taking more risk getting married? The man of course. Women have all the bias in their favor. From allegations of domestic violence, to being the custodial parent and hence extracting resources from a man she’s no longer married to.

Here’s an example of somebody close to me. She had two kids from her first husband who is “a loser.” She is now remarried with another kid. They have a new baby and neither her or the husband made enough money to justify daycare expenses. The husband decided to stay home, but has a part-time job delivering pizzas. The woman is now living in a nice house in the burbs. She makes a modest salary that I’m sure is less than her ex who is in the trades. He lives with his mother in the basement. She lives in a nice house in the burbs making less money.

In my state the math works out this way: The guy loses 26% of his income and gives it to the ex wife. That money is also tax free. Which means the woman and her part-time employed new husband can still enjoy all the tax credits for the working poor. And that’s how she can live in a nice house making less money than her ex, who lives in the basement with his mom.

Guys see these examples all the time. Since that is so, I think men should demand any woman they marry to be worth the risk.


57 posted on 04/24/2017 7:15:11 AM PDT by BJ1
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To: metmom
"That's a double standard and women DO. NOT. LIKE. IT."

Male virgins who are 21 and beyond are deemed to be social rejects and considered abnormal. A lot of women expect men to be "experienced" in the sack.

What to do, lol. Once social "protections" aka, traditional values are ridiculed to extinction, the playing field is one of confusion and not double-standards at all.
58 posted on 04/24/2017 7:16:25 AM PDT by rollo tomasi (Working hard to pay for deadbeats and corrupt politicians.)
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To: rollo tomasi
Male virgins who are 21 and beyond are deemed to be social rejects and considered abnormal. A lot of women expect men to be "experienced" in the sack.

And that is unfortunate.

But a man does not become experienced by himself.

They have nothing to complain about when they contribute to the problem of a lack of pure girls.

This is hardly evidence, but I think more girls are willing to wait than men would think. But USUALLY, it's the guy who puts the pressure on her to put out.

If you love me....

I promise I won't leave you.

Whatever it takes to get her in the sack.

And then they whine that there are no *good* girls out there?

Well, whose fault is that?

59 posted on 04/24/2017 8:22:16 AM PDT by metmom ( ...fixing our eyes on Jesus, the Author and Perfecter of our faith...)
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To: metmom
"Whatever it takes to get her in the sack."

One swipe on Tinder and transportation to the meeting place.

Getting a female in the sack is not that hard nowadays, especially if the male is half-way decent looking.
60 posted on 04/24/2017 8:46:49 AM PDT by rollo tomasi (Working hard to pay for deadbeats and corrupt politicians.)
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