I support ending the wars with massive firepower. Applied until the objective of total surrender is met. This namby pamby nation building routine of winning hearts and minds is absurd.
Your idea of what a war is, is disgusting....but 100% correct. If you go out with an objective to destroy a people AND their mindset, there is only one way. Tell the generals to make a plan to reach your stated goal, then approve it or come up with another. Either way, let the military go about it their own way. Without regard to borders, or civilians. War is hell, you cannot make It properly, aiming for Purgatory.