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To: Tumbleweed_Connection
And people thing I'M weird that I do not let anyone watch my children!
5 posted on 11/15/2003 5:48:54 PM PST by netmilsmom ( We are SITCOMs-single income, two kids, oppressive mortgage.)
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To: netmilsmom
Anybody????

No offense, please, but if you don't know anybody at all that you'd trust with your babies, how did you get the courage to bring children into the world? That's sad--the world can't be that bad, that bleak. And...they have to learn to deal with different people. You want to protect them from people who will harm them, but it's maybe not a good idea to protect them from all people who will challenge or even annoy them. You learn people skills by being around people, after all.

When I was growing up, a lot of people took care of and loved me. I gained a lot from teachers, parents of friends, other significant adults who took an interest in me and were good to me. It made up somewhat for not having good grandparents. It only augmented having good parents!

Nobody MOLESTED me or mistreated me, of course. I'm sure that's because my parents supervised and used discretion in the matter--without my being aware of that. So I wasn't scared of people. That's a good thing, isn't it?

When I was a young teenager, having conflict with my mom, having other adults to talk to about my problems was a useful pressure valve. It didn't mean I didn't love and trust my mom--but it means she didn't, and wasn't, and couldn't be all things to me at that point. She never needed to be all I needed. She was secure enough that I loved her and she loved me that she could let another adult become important to me, become a mentor to me, and guide me a little, at a time when I was being a contrary little cuss who wouldn't listen to my parents. The phase passed, as it always does, with no permanent damage done to anyone.

It doesn't take a village but it doesn't take a hermitage either....
6 posted on 11/15/2003 5:58:40 PM PST by ChemistCat (Hang in there, Terri. Absorb. Take in. Live. Heal.)
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