[Woahhs]

Please explain my "demeanor"?

Well your self-justification and rationalizing in the face of obvious behavior problems for a start. Then your retreat to the old "you're not in my shoes" canard.

But tell me, how could someone "politely" approach you to complain that your child was a little hellion? This is not a challenge, but a very real question. I know parents whose toddlers have attacked the family pet with a weapon that display that same bifurcated sense of civility you have displayed.

Also, please explain the reasoning behind "you are allowed to have your emotions?"

[netmilsmom]

>>Well your self-justification and rationalizing in the face of obvious behavior problems for a start. Then your retreat to the old "you're not in my shoes" canard.<<
Every child starts off with behavior problems, it is our job as parents to overcome them. A baby is a totally selfish being, we train them not to be. It takes work and it doesn't happen overnight. Then every child is different and what works for one may not work for another. We have to find what works. I guess that instead of saying, "you're not in my shoes." I should have said, "You have your child and I have mine."

>>But tell me, how could someone "politely" approach you to complain that your child was a little hellion? This is not a challenge, but a very real question. I know parents whose toddlers have attacked the family pet with a weapon that display that same bifurcated sense of civility you have displayed.<<
I will listen to suggestions of other parents. I think that you have made assumptions because of my choice of words. I have pinged Jonathansmommie here. She knows my girls, neither one of them are hellions and I am neither an abusive nor permissive parent.

>>Also, please explain the reasoning behind "you are allowed to have your emotions?"<<
Isn't everyone allowed to have their emotions? It is how we deal with them. It is my job as a parent to help my children to act appropriately when they feel a certain way, not tell then that it is "stupid" or "wrong" to feel angry or scared, as my parents did.

I try very hard to be the best mom I can be but sometimes the love of my children does cloud my views. I think everyone tries. If someone thinks that my children are monsters or even I am acting in a way that is inappropriate, I hope they will tell me. How can anything be changed if no one tells me?

[Dianna]

Also, please explain the reasoning behind "you are allowed to have your emotions?"

She doesn't want her adult children to be unable to deal with emotions like anger because they were forced to stuff it their whole childhood.

Kids get mad. They can express it reasonably if taught to do so. They can also be taught to deny it. Both become habit.