John Kerry faces the Elvis factor

BALTIMORE, United States (AFP) - As Democratic presidential candidates discussed Iraq (news - web sites), Haiti and the US economy in a televised debate this weekend, they suddenly found themselves asked to address an altogether more unexpected issue.

Does the clear front-runner John Kerry (news - web sites) have "enough Elvis" to take on Republican President George W. Bush (news - web sites)?

Judging by their bemused reactions, none of the four aspirants to the White House had given much thought to the campaign's hitherto unheralded Presley factor, but the questioner, CBS anchorman Dan Rather, was insistent.

"You know what I'm talking about," Rather said, explaining the concept as a Texan expression pertaining to a person's charisma or, in political jargon, his "likeability" rating.

Although rarely, if ever, posed in that particular way, the question of Kerry's personal charm, or lack of it, has become an increasingly pertinent one with the veteran Massachusetts senator's emergence as the clear favourite to take on Bush in November's presidential election.

Educated at elite boarding schools in New England and Switzerland, and later at Yale University, Kerry's image is hardly "rock-n-roll." Among the most common terms used by the US media to describe him are "aloof," "patrician" and "stiff."

And his response to Rather's query was characteristically measured and downbeat: "Give me a living room, give me a barn, give me a VFW (Veterans of Foreign Wars) hall, give me a one-on-one, and I think I can talk to anybody in this country," he said.

The greying, 60-year-old Kerry has suffered in this respect from comparisons with his only possible remaining rival for the Democratic nomination, John Edwards (news - web sites), the good-looking 50-year-old senator from North Carolina who has won rave reviews for his passionate and engaging populist style.

Even those newspapers who have publicly endorsed Kerry have felt it necessary to preface the reasons for their choice by acknowledging his handicap in the charisma stakes.

"Edwards has got it in spades," said the Baltimore Sun, admitting that Kerry was "not by nature a smiling guy."

The New York Daily News noted the "charm gap" between the two men, while Newsday agreed that the Massachusetts senator was "not the best campaigner or a particularly charismatic figure."

At another time and against another presidential incumbent, such traits might have sunk Kerry's candidacy, but post-September 11 and with US troops in Afghanistan (news - web sites) and Iraq, his experience and gravitas are seen as more valuable commodities when it comes to challenging Bush.

The New York Times, which also endorsed Kerry despite his "trouble turning out snappy sound bites," reached the same conclusion as those other newspapers which had noted his sometimes distant nature.

"In the television era, likeability is extremely important. But this is a serious business," it said.

And while the endorsement of a grand old institution like the Times might not register strongly on Dan Rather's "Elvisometer," Kerry can also lay claim to the backing of figures who have significant cachet with the more demanding MTV generation.

When Coldplay frontman Chris Martin accepted the ultra-cool British band's Record of the Year prize award at the recent Grammy Awards, he dedicated it to Kerry "who hopefully will be your president some day."

The gesture prompted one CNN pundit to suggest that "Kerry couldn't have drawn better publicity if he had staged a wardrobe malfunction with Justin Timberlake."

And a dip into Kerry's past reveals a more offbeat personality than just the decorated Vietnam war veteran of his campaign advertisements.

Showing a similar pedigree to British Prime Minister Tony Blair (news - web sites), who once played in a student band called "Ugly Rumours," the bass guitar-playing Kerry cut a record way back in 1961 with a band called the Electras.

A copy of the disc recently sold on the Internet auction site e-Bay for more than 2,000 dollars.

"I don't have time for a journal, I prefer to just mess around on my guitar," Kerry told a member of the travelling press on his campaign plane this weekend.

I actually wrote an article about this in the 2000 election, but only circulated it among friends. I guess I should have published it. There was a great song in the 1980s called "Elvis is Everywhere" by Mojo Nixon, that talked about how various celebrities either did or did not "have Elvis." I use this all the time to critique politicians as well as celebrities (i.e. Julia Roberts has Elvis, Nicole Kidman does not.) I went back through several presidential elections to show that, since Elvis became popular, the candidate with the most Elvis has won. Nixon even had the REAL Elvis campaigning for him! George H.W. Bush manufactured his Elvis, by eating pork rinds and playing the guitar with Lee Atwater, but he sure had more of it than Dukakis. He ran an Elvis-less campaign in 1992 and lost to the Elvis-y Bill Clinton. And of course, Al Gore may have been the most Elvis-less candidate of all time.

What is interesting about 2004 is that John Kerry has tried to manufacture some Elvis (playing the guitar, playing hockey, etc.) but does not appear to have been very successful. He can't escape his basic Brahmin demeanor. He is currently running a very Elvis-free campaign. I'm afraid Bush may make the mistake this year of not letting his Elvis show enough. If he doesn't, this could be a very close election. If he does, he will run away with it.

NIXON MOJO LYRICS
ELVIS IS EVERYWHERE LYRICS

When I look out into your eyes out there,
When I look out into your faces,
You know what I see?
I see a little bit of Elvis
In each and every one of you out there.
Lemme tell ya...
Weeeeeeeeeellllllll...
Elvis is everywhere
Elvis is everything
Elvis is everybody
Elvis is still the king
Man o man
What I want you to see
Is that the big E's
Inside of you and me
Elvis is everywhere, man!
He's in everything.
He's in everybody...
Elvis is in your jeans.
He's in your cheesburgers
Elvis is in Nutty Buddies!
Elvis is in your mom!
He's in everybody.
He's in the young, the old,
the fat, the skinny,
the white, the black
the brown and the blue
people got Elvis in 'em too
Elvis is in everybody out there.
Everybody's got Elvis in them!
Everybody except one person that is...
Yeah, one person!
The evil opposite of Elvis.
The Anti-Elvis
Anti-Elvis got no Elvis in 'em,
lemme tell ya.
Michael J. Fox has no Elvis in him.
And Elvis is in Joan Rivers
but he's trying to get out, man!
He's trying to get out!
Listen up Joanie Baby!
Elvis is everywhere
Elvis is everything
Elvis is everybody
Elvis is still the king
Man o man
What I want you to see
Is that the big E's
Inside of you and me
Man, there's a lot of unexplained phenomenon
out there in the world.
Lot of things people say
What the heck's going on?
Let me tell ya!
Who built the pyramids?
ELVIS!
Who built Stonehenge?
ELVIS!
Yeah, man you see guys
walking down the street
pushing shopping carts
and you think they're talking to allah,
they're talking to themself.
Man, no they're talking to ELVIS!
ELVIS! ELVIS!
You know whats going on in that Bermuda Triangle?
Down in the Bermuda Traingle
Elvis needs boats.
Elvis needs boats.
Elvis Elvis Elvis
Elvis Elvis Elvis
Elvis needs boats.
Aahh! The Sailing Elvis!
Captain Elvis!
Commodore Elvis it is.
Yeah man, you know people from outer space,
people from outer space they come up to me.
They don't look like like Doctor Spock.
They don't look like Klingons,
all that Star Trek jive.
They look like Elvis.
ELVIS!
Everybody in outer space looks like Elvis.
Cause Elvis is a perfect being.
We are all moving in perfect peace and harmony towards Elvisness
Soon all will become Elvis.
Everything everywhere will be Elvis.
Why do you think they call it evolution anyway?
It's really Elvislution!
Elvislution!
Elvis is everywhere
Elvis is everything
Elvis is everybody
Elvis is still the king
Man o man
What I want you to see
Is that the big E's
Inside of you and me
That's right ladies and gentlemen,
The time has come!
Time has come to talk
To that little bit of Elvis inside of you.
Talk to it!
Call it up!
Say "Elvis, heal me!"
"Save me, Elvis!"
"Make me be born again
in the perfect Elvis light"
That's right!
You've got that Elvis inside of ya
and he's talkin to ya
He says he wants you to sing!
Everybody's got to sing like the king!
Like the king
Get that leg going now
Get your lip too.
Not no fool Billy Idol lip either
Everybody!
Yeah, we're rockin now!
Elvis is with us.
He's with us and he's speaking to us.
He says "Peoples!"
"Peoples!"
"Everybody!"
"Everybody got to sing!"
Elvis is everywhere
Elvis is everything
Elvis is everybody
Elvis is still the king
Man o man
What I want you to see
Is that the big E's
Inside of you and me
Elvis is everywhere
Elvis is everything
Elvis is everybody
Elvis is still the king
Man o man
What I want you to see
Is that the big E's
Inside of you and me
Elvis!

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