Mom's death ends tragic life lived hard way

Valley Press ^ | March 9, 2004 | NICOLE JACOB

[BenLurkin]

LANCASTER - Pain and trauma were constant themes in Helen Carreon's life. In the end, it may have been the pain that killed her. The 30-year-old mother of six was found dead in her Lancaster home on Elm Avenue the morning of Feb. 28, the victim of what appears to be an accidental pain medication overdose.

The last two weeks of Carreon's life were a series of tragedies, beginning with a gunshot wound on Valentine's Day. The bullet, which pierced her leg, was allegedly fired by her jealous boyfriend, Byron Matheu, 25, a parolee and reputed gang member. Three days later authorities say Matheu murdered Carreon's neighbor in front of her children. Within days, Carreon was dead, too, a tragic ending to a life lived the hard way.

Nothing ever had come easy for Carreon. Kicked out of her mother's house at 12 after becoming pregnant, she had six children - all girls - by the time she was 22. She battled substance addiction, poverty, jail time and at least one abusive relationship. The father of her oldest children - ages 18, 14 and 13 - was murdered several years ago in Arizona. Her three youngest children, two 9-year-old twins and a 10-year-old, were living with their father in Riverside at the time of her death. Friends said she missed them terribly and hadn't seen them since Christmas.

Although toxicology results won't be back for several weeks from the coroner's office, Los Angeles County sheriff's investigators suspect medication to numb the pain may have ended her life. A ruling on the death will not be made until all tests are back, Coroner's spokesman David Campbell said.

Those who loved Carreon grieve her loss, while at the same time marveling at her resilience.

"Every time she got knocked down, she would just dust herself off and get back up," said Annette Banks, a close friend. "She was the heart of her family and the strength of her friends. I don't know how she did it."

Despite the problems in her life, Carreon was remembered as a happy person with a contagious laugh who went out of her way to help people, especially young teenagers. She loved to read and was known to take long baths. She couldn't wait to have grandchildren so she could spoil them, Banks said.

Her life was filled with struggles, some of them her own doing, loved ones acknowledge, and sometimes she turned to drugs when the pain overwhelmed her.

"But we loved her for who she was," Banks said.

As a single, struggling mother, Banks said, her friend longed for love and acceptance. She chose the wrong man in Matheu, and that proved to be her downfall, she said.

"It was a bad relationship," Los Angeles County sheriff's homicide detective Brian Steinwand said. "He was abusive to her."

Carreon and Matheu had been dating about 2 years, according to Carreon's oldest daughter, Kat.

"At first he was real nice to us, but then he started hitting my mom and we didn't like him no more," she said.

Matheu didn't live with the family, but he did stay there from time to time, Steinwand said. On Valentine's Day he was at the house when he and Carreon got into an argument and he accused her of cheating on him.

"He apparently pulls out a gun, and the gun goes off," Steinwand said. "She said he didn't mean to shoot her."

The bullet hit her in the leg, but Carreon took care of the wound herself. She told her children she had been playing with a gun and accidently shot herself, Kat said.

"She didn't tell us. If I had known, I would have gone after him with a baseball bat," she said.

Detectives learned of the shooting Feb. 17 while questioning Carreon about her neighbor's murder. They saw bandages on her leg and sent her to the hospital, Steinwand said.

On that day, Matheu was at the house looking for trouble, Steinwand said. He got into a fight with Arthur Morua, a neighbor and a close friend of the family.

"They started fighting, (Matheu) was losing the fight and he got one of his friends to get in there," Steinwand said. "Then, while his friend was kind of holding the guy, he gets up off the ground and shoots him in the head."

Kat and some of the other children witnessed the execution.

"Arthur was like an uncle to me," Kat said. "He always helped us out. He was just like my mom."

Kat and the others cooperated with detectives as witnesses.

"They're good kids," Steinwand said. "I feel for the kids."

Matheu is still at large, but detectives have two alleged accomplices, Richard Garcia, 24, and Rafael Espinoza, 25, in custody. News of their arrests within days of the murder was greeted happily by Carreon and her children, but another tragedy was coming.

The morning of Feb. 28, Carreon's 21-year-old sister Jodi entered Carreon's bedroom and found her lifeless body in her bed.

The family is now reeling with the sudden loss of two loved ones.

"I can't believe that we lost two great people two weeks apart," Kat said, adding that she doesn't know what the family will do next.

Money is tight, and the family doesn't have the funds for a funeral or even day-to-day expenses.

"People tell us to call if there's anything we need help with, so when we need food or help with something, I call them," she said.

Kat, who was not attending high school at the time of her mother's death, had plans of joining the Job Corps. Those plans are now on hold as she and her Aunt Jodi seek custody of her younger siblings.

A donation fund for funeral expenses and daily supplies for the children has been set up under Kat's full name, Kathleen Carreon, at Washington Mutual Bank.

In the meantime, Kat says she will use her mother's strength as an example in the trying times the family now faces.

"Even though my mom was young, she was very, very wise," Kat said. "My mom raised me so well, I think I'm stronger. We can't stop life; we have to continue for our mom."

[Little Ray]

But get 'em neutered quick?
Helen Carreon part of the gene pool needs LOTS of chlorine.

[I still care]

You are assuming this is a Democrat.

Why do I think you are right?

[BenLurkin]

My heart aches for many of the persons involved.

I've seen the inside of these kinds of lives up close an personal.

It is more pathetic than reprehensible, IMHO.

[TXBSAFH]

May God have mercy on her and her Children. Amen.

[cupcakes]

She couldn't wait to have grandchildren so she could spoil them, Banks said. ))0

My hubby has siblings like this and those siblings have their handful with their single parenting children. One of his sister's daughters is expecting her first baby anyday at 16...sigh

Her life was filled with struggles, some of them her own doing, loved ones acknowledge, and sometimes she turned to drugs when the pain overwhelmed her. >>

All of them were her own doing save for the lousy mother who didn't tend to her and let her out to get pregnant at 12 and then rejected her encouraging her to start the cycle anew.

"But we loved her for who she was," Banks said. >>

I'm sure her family and friends did. Doesn't change the fact that her life ended so soon as a result of one mistake after another.

As a single, struggling mother, Banks said, her friend longed for love and acceptance. She chose the wrong man in Matheu, and that proved to be her downfall, she said. >>

sounds like looking for love and acceptance was a downfall her entire life. Why don't poor creatures like this ever pull themselves up by the bootstraps and say they won't accept this anymore and realize they are really looking for a parent and not a boyfriend and get the help they need before they are a 22 year old mother of 6 and dead at 30? I had crappy parents too and behaved badly for a while. Before long, I just had enough of it and refused to look for THEIR love and acceptance in other people. It hurt, but I realized I had to look for a good spouse, not my mother or father and I had to realize that I was never going to get that and could only make it better for my own children when I had them.

I do feel sorry for this gal in a way. She didn' thave a chance being pregnant at 12 and rejected by I'm guessing her single parent mother, but geez, you think you get to a point where you say enough is enough.

[Pukin Dog]

I don't agree. Life is EASY for the stupid. All they have to do is stand in line for food, money, drugs and places to sleep. No mortgages, no budgets, no retirement concerns, no plumbing or roofs to fix, or car insurance to pay for.

Stress for these fools occurs only when the cable goes out.

[Core_Conservative]

"Boyfriends" sound like great cases for retroactive abortion!

[Monterrosa-24]

Once again, we see that while our well-educated and law-abiding young women marry and have two children, our unmarried young women and recent immigrants are having a great number of children. When I lived in El Salvador, I dated a bank employee who was in her mid-twenties and childless but her ironing maid who came in twice-a-week to iron had six children. My banker pal berated her maid who was unmarried and pregnant again over why she kept having so many children and the maid responded with a shrugg as if there were no other options (government-subsidized birth control pills cost three Colones per month at that time or about fifty cents U.S.). In El Salvador and in the U.S. there is a crises of the middle class under reproducing and the lower class over reproducing. There are lots of people in the world but there is always a shortage of good people. The oceans of others may swamp us especially if we don't get a hold on immigration. I love Salvadorans but we don't always get the best of them as immigrants and we can achieve a low population growth simply by curtailing immigration.

[BenLurkin]

"Sounds like looking for love and acceptance was a downfall her entire life."

Good point!

[cupcakes]

I disagree on baby #1. I think the woman's mother is primarily responsible for that initial bondoogle and her reaction? Kick a 12 year old out who will likely turn to the man who got her pregnant and make her situation worse. I give her a pass on #1, but the rest of it she could have corrected. By pregnany #1, she knew what caused babies and had plenty of time to have more in her 20's after getting an education. She chose instead to continue to lay down with the baby's father and then another man and produce more instead of taking the high road and improving her situation. Certainly, she was mature enough by age 28 when she picked a gang member to be the man in her life. At that point, you figure people learn from the mistakes they made, even if it was a parent who pushed them in that direction initially long before.

[cupcakes]

She was apparently shot in the leg by her boyfriend on Valentine's day. I'm assuming that is the pain that required pain medication. That's only a few weeks back so one would expect she might still be taking the meds, but with a history of abuse, it doesn't seem a surprise she killed herself on them.

[cupcakes]

Agreed.

[goodnesswins]

YOU are absolutely right....."Life is easy for the STUPID."

[verity]

IMHO, not every life is precious!

[squarebarb]

Actually, I kind of doubt that she was pregnant as 12 and kicked out of the house.

It doesn't sound real. The reporter heard this from somebody who wanted to make the woman seem more sympathetic and didn't check it out.

My guess is that she was pregnant at 14 or so and never got kicked out of anywhere. And then just continued to get pregnant. On social assisstance.

[SarahW]

I'm not quite prepared to agree that her children are worthless people who shouldn't reproduce.

[T.Smith]

I am.

[applemac_g4]

>U.S. there is a crises of the middle class under reproducing
>and the lower class over reproducing. There are lots of
>people in the world but there is always a shortage of good
>people. The oceans of others may swamp us especially if we
>don't get a hold on immigration.

Truer words have not been spoken on the immigration issue. You get more of what you subsidize, and right now, we are subsidizing the expansion of the bottom of the gene pool.

[PMCarey]

"Every time she got knocked down up, she would just dust herself off and get back up down,"

[tessalu]

This sounds like mental illness to me. Nothing seems right , it was all bad from the start.